6/11/2014. Session 2. INTERPERSONAL COMMUNICATION and EMOTIONAL INTELLIGENCE. Learning objectives. Learning objectives continued

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1 Session 2 INTERPERSONAL COMMUNICATION and EMOTIONAL INTELLIGENCE The publishers material used in the following activities are used with the express permission of the publisher. Learning objectives 1 Differentiate between personal, cultural and universal nonverbal communication and explain how cultural norms affect the nonverbal part of the message. 2 Explain the roles and different aspects of nonverbal communication. 3 Describe the listening process and explain how active listening has value in personal and professional situations. 4 Discuss the role of questions and feedback in personal and professional interactions. 5 Distinguish between assertive, aggressive and submissive behaviour. 2 Copyright 2013 Pearson Australia (a division of Pearson Australia Group Pty Ltd) /Dwyer/Communication for the Professions/5e Learning objectives continued 1 Describe the role of emotional intelligence in building relationships and improving performance. 2 Explain how self-awareness, self-regulation and self-motivation improve personal effectiveness in personal, social and professional situations. 3 Discuss the competencies of social awareness and social skills. 4 Describe how the Johari window explains self-concept and selfdisclosure. 3 Copyright 2013 Pearson Australia (a division of Pearson Australia Group Pty Ltd) /Dwyer/Communication for the Professions/5e 1

2 Nonverbal communication (NVC) Nonverbal communication consists of the part of a message that is not encoded in words NVC tends to be less conscious than verbal communication and therefore more difficult to control NVC complements and reinforces verbal communication but can also conflict with it Successful communicators integrate their nonverbal with the verbal and contextual information to form the total message NVC includes gestures, posture, eye movements, facial expressions, vocalisations and voice qualities 4 Copyright 2013 Pearson Australia (a division of Pearson Australia Group Pty Ltd) /Dwyer/Communication for the Professions/5e Active listening Active listening is emphatic listening and focuses attention and provides feedback Constructive feedback: focuses on what needs to be done provides support reflects understanding motivates and establishes and maintains aids positive work environments 5 Copyright 2013 Pearson Australia (a division of Pearson Australia Group Pty Ltd) /Dwyer/Communication for the Professions/5e Personal NVC The use of NVC in a way that is personal or unique to each person Accurate interpretation of nonverbal messages entails knowing the person and their communication patterns 6 Copyright 2013 Pearson Australia (a division of Pearson Australia Group Pty Ltd) /Dwyer/Communication for the Professions/5e 2

3 Cultural NVC Rule-governed behaviour learned unconsciously from others in the culture To belong to a culture, individuals have to share and to conform to attitudes, beliefs, values and norms Norms are rules of behaviour agreed upon within a group or society 7 Copyright 2013 Pearson Australia (a division of Pearson Australia Group Pty Ltd) /Dwyer/Communication for the Professions/5e Universal NVC Universal NVC refers to the body movements common to humankind, such as a smile or tears Random behaviour may distract but does not change the meaning Example: a sneeze is random but does not interfere with the message 8 Copyright 2013 Pearson Australia (a division of Pearson Australia Group Pty Ltd) /Dwyer/Communication for the Professions/5e Strategies to bridge cultural differences A mismatch between verbal and nonverbal messages of someone from another culture may be acceptable norms within his or her culture Effective communicators build positive intercultural relationships by: acknowledging cultural differences developing cultural awareness and sensitivity developing an other-orientation or empathy with people from other cultures being willing to move away from their cultural mindset in order to behave flexibly in intercultural interactions 9 Copyright 2013 Pearson Australia (a division of Pearson Australia Group Pty Ltd) /Dwyer/Communication for the Professions/5e 3

4 Roles of NVC Argyle (1983) outlined four different roles of NVC: 1 Communicating interpersonal attitudes and emotions 2 Self-presentation 3 Rituals 4 Supporting verbal communication 10 Copyright 2013 Pearson Australia (a division of Pearson Australia Group Pty Ltd) /Dwyer/Communication for the Professions/5e Verbal and nonverbal contradictions When the verbal and nonverbal messages do not match, the total message can be understood more easily by following this four-step process: 1 Hear the words 2 See the nonverbal behaviours 3 Check the meaning with the sender 4 Consider the impact of the context or setting 11 Copyright 2013 Pearson Australia (a division of Pearson Australia Group Pty Ltd) /Dwyer/Communication for the Professions/5e The listening process Listening is an active process Listening involves a five-stage conscious, knowing response to the message: Stage 1 Receiving the verbal and nonverbal messages Stage 2 Understanding the speaker s thoughts and emotions Stage 3 Remembering and retaining the message Stage 4 Evaluating or judging the message Stage 5 Responding or reacting to the message 12 Copyright 2013 Pearson Australia (a division of Pearson Australia Group Pty Ltd) /Dwyer/Communication for the Professions/5e 4

5 Types of listening Discriminative listening (most basic type) Comprehension listening Dialogical or conversational listening Biased listening Evaluative or critical listening Partial listening False listening Attentive data only listening Active listening 13 Copyright 2013 Pearson Australia (a division of Pearson Australia Group Pty Ltd) /Dwyer/Communication for the Professions/5e Feedback and barriers to listening Paraphrasing Reflective statements Clarifying statements Summarising Barriers: Preoccupation with self, external issues and pre conceived expectations of people and events. Reconstruction of messages to reflect our own attitudes and needs Attitude towards the speaker 14 Copyright 2013 Pearson Australia (a division of Pearson Australia Group Pty Ltd) /Dwyer/Communication for the Professions/5e The role of questions and feedback Giving and receiving effective feedback: supports, values, encourages and underpins positive relationships lets people know how well they are performing The total feedback message words, nonverbals, questioning and listening should always be constructive This applies to both positive and negative messages 15 Copyright 2013 Pearson Australia (a division of Pearson Australia Group Pty Ltd) /Dwyer/Communication for the Professions/5e 5

6 The value of questions The outcomes from effective questions include: positive connections with all stakeholders greater understanding of the needs of your clients gathering of better information from a variety of sources improved negotiation and conflict-management skills capacity to receive positive and constructive feedback facilitation of solution-oriented problem solving and decision making acknowledgement and encouragement of others to cooperate and collaborate ability to work more effectively with your team and help others to take responsibility for their actions 16 Copyright 2013 Pearson Australia (a division of Pearson Australia Group Pty Ltd) /Dwyer/Communication for the Professions/5e 17 Copyright 2013 Pearson Australia (a division of Pearson Australia Group Pty Ltd) /Dwyer/Communication for the Professions/5e Reframing A frame of reference is a set of complex assumptions, beliefs, values and attitudes held by an individual It influences the individual s interpretation or perception of a situation Reframing recasts or reframes the words of the speaker to create new perspectives 18 Copyright 2013 Pearson Australia (a division of Pearson Australia Group Pty Ltd) /Dwyer/Communication for the Professions/5e 6

7 Assertive behaviour Assertive behaviour is based on high self-esteem and the acceptance of self Aggressive behaviour is based on domination and often leads to conflict Submissive behaviour comes from low self-esteem 19 Copyright 2013 Pearson Australia (a division of Pearson Australia Group Pty Ltd) /Dwyer/Communication for the Professions/5e I statements I statements/messages are a way of sharing emotions and letting others know how their behaviour is perceived and how it affects you I statements/messages can have two, three or four parts 20 Copyright 2013 Pearson Australia (a division of Pearson Australia Group Pty Ltd) /Dwyer/Communication for the Professions/5e 21 Copyright 2013 Pearson Australia (a division of Pearson Australia Group Pty Ltd) /Dwyer/Communication for the Professions/5e 7

8 Emotional intelligence (EI) EI is the ability to: recognise and regulate emotions understand what they re telling you realise how they affect others EI also involves your perception of others People with high EI are usually successful in most things they do because: they are good team members they make others feel good they do not get easily upset or angry 22 Copyright 2013 Pearson Australia (a division of Pearson Australia Group Pty Ltd) /Dwyer/Communication for the Professions/5e Emotional intelligence competency clusters Emotional competence is the capacity to manage self and relationships effectively (Goleman, 1996) Emotional competence frameworks divide emotional competence into two broad categories 1 Personal competence reflected in our self-awareness and selfmanagement 2 Social competence reflected in our social awareness and relationship management 23 Copyright 2013 Pearson Australia (a division of Pearson Australia Group Pty Ltd) /Dwyer/Communication for the Professions/5e 24 Copyright 2013 Pearson Australia (a division of Pearson Australia Group Pty Ltd) /Dwyer/Communication for the Professions/5e 8

9 Self-awareness Self-awareness concerns knowing one s: internal states preferences resources intuitions It influences: the way one relate to others one s capacity or readiness for self-disclosure one s ability to give and receive feedback in interpersonal relationships one s level of emotional intelligence 25 Copyright 2013 Pearson Australia (a division of Pearson Australia Group Pty Ltd) /Dwyer/Communication for the Professions/5e Self-regulation Self-regulation involves managing one s : internal states impulses resources Attributes of people who possess self-regulation include: emotional self-control trustworthiness conscientiousness adaptability innovativeness 26 Copyright 2013 Pearson Australia (a division of Pearson Australia Group Pty Ltd) /Dwyer/Communication for the Professions/5e Self-motivation Self-motivation refers to a cluster of four competencies: achievement drive commitment initiative optimism 27 Copyright 2013 Pearson Australia (a division of Pearson Australia Group Pty Ltd) /Dwyer/Communication for the Professions/5e 9

10 Social awareness and relationship management Social competence involves developing social awareness and social skills Social competence leads to positive, constructive relationships Social awareness refers to how people manage relationships and awareness of others feelings, needs and concerns It involves: empathy organisational awareness service orientation 28 Copyright 2013 Pearson Australia (a division of Pearson Australia Group Pty Ltd) /Dwyer/Communication for the Professions/5e Developing a positive self concept People with a more consistent self-view: have clearer self-knowledge are more assertive have self-experiences that are less affected by perspectives of others (Suh, 2002, p1378) 29 Copyright 2013 Pearson Australia (a division of Pearson Australia Group Pty Ltd) /Dwyer/Communication for the Professions/5e 30 Copyright 2013 Pearson Australia (a division of Pearson Australia Group Pty Ltd) /Dwyer/Communication for the Professions/5e 10

11 Self-esteem Esteem is the regard or favourable opinion in which a person is held by others Self-esteem is respect for self Increasing your self-esteem will help you function effectively in school, in your interpersonal relationships, and in your career. (DeVito, 2000, p78) 31 Copyright 2013 Pearson Australia (a division of Pearson Australia Group Pty Ltd) /Dwyer/Communication for the Professions/5e Self-disclosure Self-disclosure involves revealing feelings and reactions to the present situation Self-disclosure at an appropriate time and in the right context can lead to an improvement in: communication skills self-awareness self-confidence relationships 32 Copyright 2013 Pearson Australia (a division of Pearson Australia Group Pty Ltd) /Dwyer/Communication for the Professions/5e The Johari window The Johari window divides the elements that make up each person s self-concept into two broad categories: the areas of yourself known to you: self the areas of yourself known to others: others It then divides these categories into four parts that make up our self-concept public arena hidden arena blind spot unknown area 33 Copyright 2013 Pearson Australia (a division of Pearson Australia Group Pty Ltd) /Dwyer/Communication for the Professions/5e 11

12 34 Copyright 2013 Pearson Australia (a division of Pearson Australia Group Pty Ltd) /Dwyer/Communication for the Professions/5e 12

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