People. Overcoming Negativity in the workplace. Positive VS Negative. Habits of Negative People. They... Habits of Positive People

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1 Overcoming Negativity in the workplace People Positive VS Negative Martha N. Bryan, Presenter Habits of Negative People Attendance problems Unlikeable and undesirable personality doesn t blend in. Lacks initiative in the work has to be told what to do. Doesn t exhibit leadership or decision making skills. Entertains gossip, rumors and likes minding other people s business. Uses work time for personal business. Doesn t take responsibility for their own actions. Puts the blame on others for their mistakes and failures. Not open to new ideas, new learning, new things and new methods. Choosy as to the type of work that is being assigned to them. Doesn t practice professionalism in talking and dealing with others Never runs out of excuses and alibis for not producing results. They... Habits of Positive People Have a dream and a plan. Are willing to work hard. Don t take no for an answer. Take responsibility for their actions. Look for solutions to problems and makes decisions. Have the courage to admit mistakes. Are self-reliant. Have specific knowledge, skills, training, and talent. Work with and cooperate with other people. Are enthusiastic. Never give up. 1

2 Negativity Bad Attitudes... Where Do They Come From? What Causes Bad Attitudes? & Where Do They Come From? Boss Organization Culture Individual Family Society Do These Negative Workplace Issues Sound Familiar? Negativity... A lack of trust is keeping morale low. Employees make preventable mistakes because they don t care. No one seems to have fun at work anymore. Employees spend too much time complaining and griping. The rumor mill is out of control. Employees talk badly about management and others Workplace absenteeism is increasing. Back-stabbing / biting are creating an adversarial environment. People stop talking when the manager comes in. is the result of unbridled and unchecked pessimism. An Optimistic Attitude Brings Hopefulness. A Pessimistic Attitude Brings Helplessness. People aren t disturbed by things, but by the views they take of them. ~ Epictetus 2

3 How Bad Attitudes Gets Started How Bad Monday s Get Started Thoughts Attitudes! Beliefs Beliefs... What we hold to be true Perceptions... Our impression of people and events Interpretations... How we give meaning to a situation Perceptions Interpretations Your living is determined not so much by what life brings to you as by the attitude you bring to life; not so much by what happens to you as by the way your mind looks at what happens. ~ John Homer Miller FOCUS... YOUR CHOICE Different Vocations Different Views Negative Approach Pain Fear What You Don t Want Preoccupied With Pitfalls / Problems Searches For Problems Dreads The Worst Positive Approach Pleasure Desire What You Want Seeks Out Fresh Side Searches For Solutions Seeks For The Best Persistent Useful Pragmatism Realistic Unbridled Pessimism Pessimism Optimism Optimism Technical Jobs Relational Jobs Accuracy Relationship Compliance Resilience 3

4 Degrees of Pessimism & Optimism Situational Negativity Two Forms Of Negativity Habitual Negativity Is An Initial Reaction To An Event Is a Way of Life (Repeated Pattern) Persistent Useful Pragmatism Realistic Unbridled Pessimism Pessimism Optimism Optimism (Preoccupied (Realist, practical (Don t worry, be with what is results oriented happy all is wrong) addresses valid concerns) possible) To Overcome... Confront Cope Continue On Past It! To Deal With... Remember Life is a Choice Sharpen Your Awareness Don t Get Sucked In Thinking Makes It So! How Negativity Travels... The Catalysts The Negativity Cycle Negative Thoughts Contagious Mood Decreased Productivity = Decreased Job Satisfaction Negative Behavior Negative Feelings Conflicting Views Non-Productive Communication Behaviors 4

5 The Effects Of Negative Thoughts And Feelings Include... drain your energy. block positive thought and creative thought. cause stress and worry. cause anger and illness. They... reduce productivity. prolong painful situations. affect the way you listen to others. affect the way you communicate with others. affect the way you deal with others. take the fun out of your life. Attitude... How we choose to think. Feeling... What we get for thinking the way we do. We Know We choose our thoughts. 2. Thoughts create reality. 3. Reality determines behavior. 4. Behavior leads to results. We ve Learned Life Is A Choice! Learn to Interpret... How To Overcome Negativity? Events & People Optimistically. Developing a Winning Attitude Recognize your insecurities and take action to correct. Control self-talk. Don t think about what you don t have. Identify successes and focus on your talents. Offer name first in every conversation. Don't underestimate your intelligence or overestimate others. Practice speaking up every chance you get. Become an expert in your profession. Be thankful. Start a victory wall and file. (Continued) 5

6 Developing a Winning Attitude (Continued) Graciously accept compliments. Help others to build confidence in themselves. Maintain good body posture and walk faster. Work to improve assertion skills. Maintain good eye contact. Be positive even when you don t feel like it. Make smiling a habit. Strive for excellence and not perfection. What the Individual Can Do... To Get Workplace Needs Met The Need For Purpose The Need For Appreciation The Need For Control The Need To Belong Satisfying Your Workplace Needs Loving Work Have Task Interest. Be The Best. Keep Yourself Motivated. Play By The Rules. Identify People Who Can Help. Get Results. Identify The Reward System. Satisfying Your Workplace Needs Loving Work (Continued) Come To Terms With The Fear Of Failure. Come To Terms With The Fear Of Rejection. Get Feedback. Make Changes Based On Results Needed. Take A Wholistic Approach. Commit To Life Long Learning. Learn From Role Models. (Continued) 6

7 Eliminating Workplace Negativity... What The Individual Can Do Reprogram Your Mind What You Talk About Expands What You Write About Expands What You Read About Expands What You Look at Expands What You Listen to Expands Eliminating Bad Attitudes... What the Individual Can Do Avoid neg-attacks. Shift focus to the positive. Practice forgiveness. Ask yourself What is the best / worst...? Determine the source and avoid it. Change your physiology. Eliminate any benefit you might receive. View every challenge as an opportunity. Realize - You can only do what you can do. You Must Constantly Ask Yourself... Who am I around? What are they doing to me? What have they got me reading? What have they got me saying? Where do they have me going? What do they have me thinking? And most important, what do they have me becoming? Then Ask Yourself The Big Question: Is That Okay? ~ Jim Rohn Self Reflection Quick Fixes For Controlling Negativity Set a time limit for negativity. Focus on the big picture. Set ground rules. Look at quality criticism as a plus. Use flip side thinking. Stop the thought! Caught it and rethought it. Use a rubber band to snap away the negativity. Use the win-win approach to resolve problems. (continued) 7

8 Quick Fixes For Controlling Negativity (Continued) Surround yourself with optimistic people. Be your own best friend - control internal dialogue. Play your winners... your strengths. Develop new skills. Do something to help others. Alter, Avoid, Accept. Reward yourself for being positive. Lock in the negativity at work (at home). Quick Fixes For Controlling Negativity (Continued) Recognize the negativity trigger points. Take a time-out. Provide an attitude checkup. Encourage laughter. Use the tape recorder. Keep thoughts in the present. Keep future focused. Have a favorite saying. (Continued) The Feelings Of Life... Do Not Reflect The Facts Of Life How Organizations Fuel Negative Thinkers Purpose not clear People working at cross purposes Expectations and limitations not clear Not open to change Accomplishments not recognized A policy of secrecy exists Employee s concerns are ignored Meetings and other activities are seen as a waste of time Lacking people skills Lying by omission, padding budgets, withholding information Stepping on others to make it to the top Paying little attention to environmental needs Managing To Keep Negativity Out Of The Workplace... Are We... leading by a positive example?... keeping the promises we made?... giving effective recognition?... keeping team members challenged?... giving team members a chance to participate in decisions?... sharing information equally, honest, and direct manner?... establishing clear and achievable visions?... applying policies and rules equally and fairly to everyone? Or, Are We... creating too many rules for everyone when only a few are at fault?... letting people get by with complaining? 8

9 Dealing With The Negative Employee Thank the employee for their contributions. Explain the problem behavior. Ask if they are aware of this behavior, or that it is a problem. Provide concrete examples of what needs changing. Give an explanation of how their behavior affects others. Provide concrete examples of the desired behavior. Review a prepared, written performance improvement plan. Explain the consequences if the behavior doesn t change. Reiterate the abilities they have. Provide encouragement and state your belief in their ability to make changes. 1. Confront behavior before performance becomes an issue. 2. Develop a plan. Confronting 3. Choose the appropriate time / place to confront the behavior: a. Do not confront or criticize in public. The b. Choose neutral territory. c. Allow enough time for a complete discussion. Behavior 4. Adopt the appropriate attitude: a. Stay calm. b. Be firm and assertive. c. Focus on the behavior. d. Be concise. 5. Set up consequences. a. Set goals for change. b. Follow through on pre established consequences. 6. Reinforce positive behavior. 7. Listen (don t assume, give employee a chance to explain his / her side). 8. Stick to issues you can control (work behavior and performance) and refer employee to the Employee Assistance Program to address underlying issues. 9. Repeat discussion as necessary. 10. Have follow up meetings to discuss improvements / progress on objectives. 11. Remember, some things can t be fixed. Stopping Negativity In Others Focus On Behavior. Identify Negative Behavior And Its Impact. Listen To Their Response. Develop Action Plan. Monitor Change. Give Feedback. Everything can be taken from a person but one thing; the last of the human freedoms -- to choose one s attitude in any given set of circumstances, to choose one s own way. ~ Victor Frankel, Auschwitz Prisoner Author Man s Search for Meaning Overcoming Negativity in the Workplace The End! Martha N. Bryan, Presenter marthabryan@bryanandbryanassoc.com 9

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