Transforming Public Speaking Anxiety Workbook

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2 Transforming Public Speaking Anxiety Workbook This workbook is designed to accompany 5 Proven Methods to Transform Public Speaking Anxiety, which is Part 2 of Your True Voice: How to Speak with Power and Presence. Please refer to the video for full details. Then, print out this workbook and go through it to personalize your experience.

3 First, let s normalize fear around public speaking. There s nothing wrong with you! Nervousness and Discomfort are just other names for Fear. Don t get stuck on the name! What do you call your experience? Why do you call it that? When does fear arise in you? c Weeks or months before a speaking engagement c The night before c Right before a talk c During a talk when something goes wrong c I don t do speaking engagements because of the fear

4 Often, strange things happen in the body. What happens for you? c Shaking hands or knees c Dry mouth c Heart beating intensely c Sweating c Flushed face c Can t think or speak clearly c Other: Did you know that these experiences are common? And that there s nothing wrong with you? c Yes c No

5 Why does fear and nervousness arise? There are several very common reasons. First and foremost, this is a nervous system response. You may have heard of the fight, flight freeze response as well as the lesser known analyze. These are what occur when we feel threatened or unsafe. Ø Fight: Less common for speaking, we get argumentative, defensive, or blaming. Ø Flight: We want to flee and run away because it doesn t feel safe. Ø Freeze: Think of the deer in the headlights, frozen with fear: we tense up and can t think clearly. This is the most common nervous system response to public speaking anxiety. Ø Analyze: Instead of taking appropriate action, we tend to overthink an issue. What are your patterns you easily recognize? And when do they tend to occur?

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7 Second, most people don t know how to effectively prepare beforehand. Most people just look over a talk and think about what they are going to say which isn t enough to really get ready to be in the vulnerable position of speaking in front of others as well as to get ready to knock their socks off! This results in feeling nervous beforehand, as well as not doing a great job the first few minutes (until you get warmed up). Unfortunately, that costs you a good first impression, which you have to try to earn back later. How do you usually prepare for a talk?

8 Third, it s common to have a negative mindset. For example, we become overly worried about what the audience is going to think. We are afraid of judgment and rejection. Or, we might believe that being an introvert means we can t speak well which isn t true. Many great speakers and performers are introverts! There are countless other negative mindsets. These basically are false beliefs that limit us. Remember FEAR is False Evidence Appearing Real! List some of your negative mindsets/beliefs here:

9 Fourth: Aversion. Many people avoid speaking or they avoid dealing with the anxiety or nervousness. If you aren t facing it, you actually are continuing to create, to perpetuate, a bad relationship with it. Details can be found 9 minutes into the video. What s your relationship with speaking? Is it healthy? Do you want it but push it away? Write about it here:

10 Fifth, most people don t truly know what it takes to become a powerful speaker. You might have created assumptions based on what you saw Or someone made it seem easy, and yet you still found it to be challenging Or the fear never went away. What are your beliefs around what it takes to be a great speaker?

11 5 Methods to Transform Fear and Anxiety All five of these methods are necessary. Transforming nervousness, discomfort and anxiety generally cannot be solved by taking a pill: there are several necessary steps. 1) Shift your state. Learn how to transform, repattern and reprogram your nervous system response. a. Learn how to totally relax your body. b. Breathe diaphragmatically, with your belly. This will also help you enhance the resonance of your voice. 2) Learn how to warm up! You need to warm up: a. Physically because speaking is an embodied act. b. Vocally warm up your voice to access all of its dynamics. c. Emotionally and Mentally how to get yourself in the game and be fully emotionally ready. 3) Cultivate a Confidence Mindset. There are so many good ones! And they re different for different people. However, here are some that surely will help:

12 1. The audience wants to you be great! No one wants to be bored. Everyone wants to be inspired even people who are pessimistic or jaded. Maybe even especially them. Name a time in your life that you felt appreciated: 2. Stop taking yourself so seriously! When we make something Really Important, we put a lot of stress and pressure on ourselves that works against us. So put your talk in perspective. Have gratitude for all that you have in your life! And then have fun! Relax. Enjoy this amazing gift you were given!

13 Name some ways you could get perspective and some things in your life you are grateful for: 3. Cultivate a positive relationship with speaking! Imagine it like a relative of yours, or a friend, you want to be closer to. How could you treat it well? And, how could you treat yourself well? Note: #1, #2, and #3 all require time to transform. Stay tuned for details about the Claim Your Voice training, which addresses these comprehensively.

14 4) Explore the fear and nerves around speaking. Rather than avoid it or pretend it isn t there, examine it. Go to around 15:30 in the video to be guided through a powerful exercise. You can then answer these questions here as well. What images come up around public speaking? How does the fear protect you or keep you safe?

15 How does the anxiety work against you, against your well-being, happiness and success? What sensations in the body arise when you imagine or experience anxiety around speaking? What is the quality or texture of the sensation?

16 Does it have a shape? Color? Texture? Does it have a temperature, like warm or cold? Be guided through releasing it, and turning into your personal power, and reclaim your energy, around minute 18:30.

17 5) You must know what it takes to become a powerful, masterful speaker. It s important to take the mystery out of what you need to do to become a powerful speaker. When you see it clearly, it becomes possible for you to go to the next level. We ll go into detail about this in Part 3 of Your True Voice, The Powerful Speaker Blueprint. Be sure to stay tuned. In the meantime, you can take the Speaker IQ quiz. It ll take just a few minutes, and will help you: 1) get a sense of your skills now, 2) see what you need next and 3) get a better idea of what s possible for you overall as a powerful speaker. Remember: Fear is simply trapped power. And the world wants you the real you as an inspiring presence in the world. So be sure to release the old stories, and to find your confidence so that you can be the change the world needs.

18 ABOUT THE AUTHOR Jonathan Bender, MS, MFA has helped thousands of entrepreneurs and professionals become confident, authentic and dynamic speakers who change lives. Jonathan s work blends professional speaking skills with performance technique (acting, voice and movement) with personal development. The founder of the WholeSpeak Method, he also trains and certifies coaches. Jonathan is also the creator of Connection Jams and The Performance of Your Life. He holds Masters degrees in both communication and performance, and is a theatre director, actor and creator. A coach for 20 years, he specializes in working with those who care as much about growing themselves as they do their careers: his clients range from CEOs to entrepreneurs to actors, and people from 5 continents have taken his trainings. Visit YourTrueVoice.com for more.

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