SUCCESS THROUGH EMOTIONAL INTELLIGENCE

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1 Volume 6, Issue 8 (August, 2017) UGC APPROVED Online ISSN Published by: Abhinav Publication Abhinav National Monthly Refereed Journal of Research in SUCCESS THROUGH EMOTIONAL INTELLIGENCE Dr. V. B. Ghare Professor, Bhonsla Military College, Nasik, India vasant100353@gmail.com ABSTRACT Every individual, a big or small, wealthy or poor, wants to be happy and live a comfortable life. Each one has certain abilities, cultures, beliefs, priorities, ideas and what not. In a society we observe there is at times conflicting people. Conflict arises because of lack of acceptability and likelihood for adaptation. Therefore, everyone perceives that few are successful and many are unsuccessful, like him. But intelligence is a commodity not commonly available, as is said about common sense. This feeling is the outcome of individual emotional back-ground. To convert this phenomenon into successful feeling, emotions play a vital role. It is the subject matter of this paper. Keywords: Traits; Intelligence; Understand; Habit INTRODUCTION Every individual is striving for success in life. Be he or she an employee, businessman, professional, agriculturist, shop-owner, teacher, professor, principal or doing any activity for earning livelihood. Success brings an individual recognition, prestige and respect. Success is a relative term based on objectivity. However, success and failure are two sides of same coin and there is very thin line between them. Success depends on the life style one has adopted and what has been the state of mind. It is determined on the basis of assets one posse, from the point of others, whereas the state of mind is a composition of one s tangible and intangible assets. If we draw, in a very crude Balance Sheet format, the capital value of one s earnings as compared against liabilities is the value of what one has achieved in life. OBJECTIVE Now a day we come across many situations when people are not able to adapt to it, resulting into anger and culminating into clash between inter-personal relations. It may be due to changed family model, self centered attitude, no hopeful tomorrow etc. This is the resultant from lack of understanding and taking the things on face value. To overcome such a deadlock and help develop individuals into better citizens, Emotional Intelligence plays a vital role. The purpose of this paper is to highlight and clarify the importance. Plato has simplified the concept of Emotional Intelligence as Emotional intelligence involves our ability to understand, express, and control our emotions. Further he advocated that all learning has an emotional base. The ability to express and control our own emotions is important. Our ability to understand, interpret, and respond to the emotions of others has a role play in our interactions with other individuals. Psychologists refer to this ability as emotional intelligence, and some experts even suggest that it can be more important that Intelligence cotenant. Available online on 110

2 The objective of this paper is to relate the fundamental functions relating to emotions and its intellectual use in managing behavioural pattern while communicating others. The sense of control on emotions, effective use of techniques to handle different situations live a peaceful and lead a successful life. HISTORY AND BACK-GROUND It would be interesting to know how emotional intelligence has progressed during the 20 th century. In 1930s, Edward Thomdike described the concept of "social intelligence" as the ability to get along with other people. During 1940s David Wechsler suggested that effective components of intelligence may be essential to success in life. Humanistic psychologist named Abraham Maslow described how people can build emotional strength, through cognition in 1950s. After 25 years, since then Howard Gardner published his book named The Shattered Mind, which introduced the concept of multiple intelligences 1985, Wayne Payne introduced the term emotional intelligence in his doctoral thesis entitled "A study of emotion: developing emotional intelligence; selfintegration; relating to fear, pain and desire. In 1987, in an article published in Mensa Magazine, Keith Beasley used the term "emotional quotient." He claimed to have used this term for the first time, however, after few months it was noticed Reuven Bar had used the same terminology, in his graduate thesis which was not published. The concept of emotional intelligence was popularized after publication of psychologist and New York Times science writer Daniel Goleman s book Emotional Intelligence: Why It Can Matter More Than IQ. Emotional intelligence is a very recent philosophy, hardly emerged during last 25 years. Peter Salovey and John D. Mayer have been the leading researchers on emotional intelligence since In their influential article "Emotional Intelligence," they defined emotional intelligence as, "the subset of social intelligence that involves the ability to monitor one's own and others' feelings and emotions, to discriminate among them and to use this information to guide one's thinking and actions" DEFINITION There were different opinions as to whether Emotional intelligence is a science before 1950s. Sir Isaac was the leading psychologist who did not accept it as science. The ability to perceive and understand feelings of others and the act of controlling own feelings can be treated as emotional intelligence as defined by John Mayer and Peter Soothe. They tried to establish relation between emotions and intelligence. Emotional Intelligence can be defined as the ability to monitor one's own and other people's emotions, to discriminate between different emotions and label them appropriately and to use emotional information to guide thinking and behaviour. However, substantial disagreement exists regarding the definition of emotional intelligence, with respect to both terminology and operational methods. Egyptians believed that heart is the place of origin of both emotions and intelligence. Darwin advocated that, free expression of emotions is necessary to survive the struggles of life. Therefore after death, while preserving the bodies in mumys they used to separate the brain from the body. Currently, there are three main models of emotional intelligence, as follows - 1. Ability model 2. Mixed model 3. Trait model Different models have led to the development of various instruments for the assessment of the construct. While some of these measures may overlap, most researchers agree that they tap different constructs. 1. Ability model: The ability-based model views emotions as useful sources of information that help one to make sense of and navigate the social environment. The model proposes that individuals vary in their ability to process information of an emotional nature and in their ability to relate emotional VOL. 6, ISSUE 8 (August, 2017) 111

3 processing to a wider cognition. This ability is seen to manifest itself in certain adaptive behaviours. The model claims that emotional intelligence includes four types of abilities: Perceiving emotions The ability to detect and decipher emotions in faces, pictures, voices, and cultural beliefs including the ability to identify one's own emotions. Perceiving emotions represents a basic aspect of emotional intelligence, as it makes all other processing of emotional information possible. Using emotions The ability to harness emotions to facilitate various cognitive activities, such as thinking and problem solving. The emotionally intelligent person can capitalize fully upon his or her changing moods in order to best fit the task at hand, and modify behaviour and responses as the situation needs. Understanding emotions The ability to comprehend emotion language and to appreciate complicated relationships among emotions. Managing emotions The ability to regulate emotions in both one and in others. The emotionally intelligent person can manage emotions to achieve intended goals. The current measure of Mayer and Salovey's model of, the Mayer-Salovey-Caruso Emotional Intelligence Test (MSCEIT) is based on a series of emotion-based problem-solving items. By testing a person's abilities on each of the four branches of emotional intelligence, it generates scores for each of the branches as well as a total score. Central to the four-branch model is the idea that emotional intelligence requires attainment to social norms. The MSCEIT is unlike standard IQ tests, because these items do not have objectively correct responses. 2. Mixed model: The model introduced by Daniel Goleman focuses as a wide array of competencies and skills that drive leadership performance. This model outlines five main constructs. Self-awareness - the ability to know one's emotions, strengths, weaknesses, drives, values and goals and recognize their impact on others while using them to guide decisions. Self-regulation this involves controlling or redirecting one's disruptive emotions and impulses and adapting to changing circumstances. Social-skills - managing relationships to move people in the desired direction Empathy - considering other people's feelings especially while making decision Motivation - being driven to achieve for the sake of achievement. Goleman included a set of emotional competencies within each construct of emotional intelligence. Emotional competencies are not innate talents, but rather learned capabilities that must be acquired and can be developed to achieve outstanding performance. He narrated that individuals are born with a general emotional intelligence that determines their potential for learning emotional competencies. The Emotional Competency Inventory (ECI), which was created in 1999, and the Emotional and Social Competency Inventory (ESCI), a newer edition of the ECI was developed in Trait model: Konstantinos Vasilis Petrides proposed a conceptual distinction between the ability based model and a trait based model of emotional intelligence. Emotional intelligence has been developing over many years in numerous publications. Trait model is "a constellation of emotional self-perceptions located at the lower levels of personality." This definition encompasses behavioural dispositions and self-perceived abilities and is measured by self report, as opposed to the ability based model which refers to actual abilities, which have proven highly resistant to scientific measurement. The conceptualization of emotional intelligence, as a personality trait leads to a construct that lies outside the testimony of human cognitive ability. This is an important distinction in as much as, it bears direct relationship with operational construct and the theories and hypotheses that are formulated about it. VOL. 6, ISSUE 8 (August, 2017) 112

4 Emotional intelligence is that something within us that help to sense how we feel and enables to truly connect with others and form a bond. Emotional intelligence gives us the ability to be present and listen to someone when it is most needed. Emotional intelligences is that sense of internal balance within us that enables to keep our composure, make good decisions, communicate successfully and continue our effective leadership even when under stress. Every individual is born with some intelligence; few are born with a great deal of emotional intelligence; while others are not. Most of us are not aware of how our emotions may be adversely affecting our thinking and our reactions. Now a day, it is possible to learn and increase our emotional intelligence. We can take an assessment to determine our emotional quotient and level of emotional intelligence. When one gains ability for effective use of emotional intelligence, which results in increasing ability to develop more solid, trusting relationships in personal life. Our understanding of emotional intelligence will vastly improve our internal relations and deepen our sense of personal achievement and professional accomplishment. The stronger internal relations mean a stronger bottom line. IQ (Intelligence Quotient) is an individual s score when performing a series of tests designed to measure intellectual intelligence. Higher IQs indicate better cognitive abilities - including the ability to learn and understand - and people with higher IQs are more likely to do well in academics, without exerting the same amount of mental effort as those with lower IQ scores. A logical assumption is that people with higher IQs will be more successful at work and through life. This assumption has been proven incorrect there is more to success than simply being clever. Emotional Intelligence is the measure of an individual s abilities to recognise and manage their emotions, and the emotions of other people, both individually and in groups. To generalize, we can say that people with higher emotional intelligence find it easier to form and maintain effective interpersonal relationships and to fit in to group situations. And so also people with higher EIs are better at understanding their own psychological state, which include managing stress effectively and being less likely to suffer from depression. ELEMENTS OF EMOTIONAL INTELLIGENCE Emotional Intelligence is split between our personal and interpersonal skill, these are sometimes referred to as personal and social competencies. Within each of these sections are a range of skills which are the elements of emotional intelligence. Personal Skills: Self awareness is the skill of being aware of understanding own emotions as they occur and evolve. Emotions are not either positive or negative, but rather appropriate or inappropriate. Anger is normally associated with a negative emotion. People find ways to mask emotions rather than giving an ear to it. They can find it difficult to analysis own emotions. It becomes difficult when they have suppressed them for a long time. For many, it may be hard to accurately recognise emotions and therefore understand them. Effective self assessment demonstrates good emotional intelligence and will help to improve confidence and self esteem. Self management skills relate to the emotions at a given time. The fundamental to self management is self-control. Self control is recognising emotions and controlling them appropriately. Self management includes knowing personal limits and abilities. Personal time-management, self-motivation and assertiveness are the key skills. Personal development is a concern to become a better person by learning new skills. Inter-personal skills: These are skills used to interact with other people. Emotional intelligence includes how one understands others and their emotions. Social awareness is a set of skills used to understand the feelings and emotions of others, individually as well as a group. In the process it is very pertinent to inculcate habit of effective listening, both verbal and non-verbal, body language, gestures, physical sings etc. VOL. 6, ISSUE 8 (August, 2017) 113

5 The last element is concerned with developing strong social skills through building rapport with others. Rapport enhances the effectiveness of communication which the basis for building meaningful, lasting relations. By developing social skills, it becomes easy to talk freely, be a good listener, command respect and trust, and improves self esteem. OBSERVATIONS To put in simple words, emotional intelligence can certainly be improved, whatever be the present level, through concerted efforts and willingness to change ways. Those having high EQ should consider jobs which ask for interaction with people on a regular basis. This would offer exposure to personality and the varied experiences will help improve. Emotional intelligence basically aims, not just controlling feeling but control oneself, and for that the things need to be analysed properly in details. The process of development has to be step by step and may need to be reviewed, analysed, and modified in between. We can narrate the steps as follows 1. Note emotional reactions to events throughout the day. 2. Pay attention to body behaviour. 3. Observe how emotions and behaviour are connected. 4. Do not be judgmental on emotions. 5. Analyse and note patterns in emotional history. 6. Practice deciding how to behave. 7. Be open minded and ready to agree. 8. Improve empathy skills. 9. Learn to read and understand from body language of others. 10. Measure effectiveness on others. 11. Practice being emotionally honest. 12. Make SWOT analyse and find out areas need to be improved. 13. Learn to control stress level by raising EQ. 14. Be lighted hearted at work, home, rather every walk of life. CONCLUSION What are the indications of success? In general, success does not come free, it has a cost. One has to forgo many materialistic things to gain success. Human being is a social animal, he cannot live in isolation. His intangible needs, such as recognition, respect, trust, communication, relationship etc. are possible only when he is a part of society. He has to create and maintain relations, interact with others, listen, talk and walk within the construed social norms. We come across many examples of successful people, and also getting carried away with the achievements. Those who become successful and still manage to remain attached to the ground are respected by everyone. Normally, it is felt that wealth is the source to obtain success, but it is not the truth. One may possess wealth, but living a stressful life is not worth. One who lives stress free life, getting a goodnight sleep, healthy and no worries, is well accepted by the social groups, to which he is associated, can be a successful individual in true sense. To my mind, Sachin Tendulkar and Amitabh Bacchan can be the role models of success for everyone in 21 st century. Very recently we experienced the ICC World Cup tournament. Australians lifted the Cup for the 5 th time. I would quote two major instances from the tournament. Why, Australians are called as VOL. 6, ISSUE 8 (August, 2017) 114

6 professionals? They enter the ground with full preparation, analyse each member from the opposite team, have a specific strategy for each player, and most importantly are determined to execute the same under any given circumstances. This, according to me, they have achieved only through emotional intelligence. The second example is relating to Australia s match with Pakistan. I would prefer to remain away from commenting whether it was right or wrong, but certainly it was not a cricket match but an emotional war between two teams. With the help of continued research, science has discovered the role that emotional intelligence plays in our life. It has now been established that IQ alone cannot be of great help to advance life. On the contrary, as stated by John Gothman, emotional awareness and ability to handle feelings determine the level of success and happiness in all walks of life. Daniel Goleman described importance of emotional intelligence, in his book, Emotional Intelligence which is based on case studies. He has analysed and narrated a 3 point formula, 1. Use of intelligence while expressing emotions helps improve life. 2. Emotions are like habits. Many times, while expressions emotions, one tends to use habitual pattern which, distract the exact feelings conveyed through words. 3. The ability to control emotions will avoid wasteful activities, which can be channelized for inculcating positive things and improve living process. In his book Working with Emotional Intelligence he has identified 4 fundamental concepts, such as, understanding and recognising self, manage own activities effectively, perceive and understand feelings of others and effective management of relations. To summaries, emotional intelligence helps an individual to change oneself according to the situation one is facing. Lastly, when one nocks a closed door, he is not aware, who would be opening it. The probability can vary from small child, a young lady, a teenager, house-wife, retired person or an old lady. At such an instance, the visitor should be ready with alternate opening statement, to face any of the probability. This is not an easy task, but one has to learn and develop the skill. Emotional intelligence is the answer to develop oneself and become a more successful person. REFERENCES 1. Achyut Godbole Manat Manasashtracha Utkanthawardhak Ramya Safar (2012) Marathi Edition. 2. Daniel Goleman Amazon in Working With Emotional Intelligence (2000) 3. Daniel Goleman Amazon in Emotional Intelligence: Why It Can Matter More Than IQ (1996) 4. Daniel Goleman Amazon in Emotional Intelligence (2004) 5. Eric Berne Games People Play: Psychology of Human (1980) 6. Horward Gardner The Shattered Mind (1979) Article Published in British Journal of Psychology, Vol.70, Issue John McCrone Going Inside: A Tour Round A Single Moment Of Consciousness (1999) 8. Robert Wintson The Human Mind (2004) 9. Thomas Harris I Am OK, You Are OK (1995) VOL. 6, ISSUE 8 (August, 2017) 115

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