Emotional Intelligence
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1 Emotional Intelligence Rae Lyon MU Extension & Engagement University of Missouri 1 MTI offers custom-built training and consulting services. For more information: or visit our website at mti.missouri.edu. 2 1
2 Emotional Intelligence Emotional intelligence (EI) is the ability to identify and manage emotional information in oneself and others and to focus energy on required behaviors to have healthy, effective relationships. Simply defined, it s the ability to know and understand your feelings and how they affect your actions and relationships. 3 Emotional Intelligence 90% of what defines top performers is EQ % of employees perception of work climate is linked to the EQ skills of the leader. SOURCE: MHS Emotional Intelligence 4 2
3 Emotional Intelligence In the workplace, emotional intelligence helps you manage your moods and reactions to make you a more effective, productive and less stressed out employee/leader. 5 Emotional Intelligence Emotions HIJACK our cognitive abilities: Slight provocation, our ability to apply reason can drop 75%. Several to two different cognitive concepts. Emotions cause black/white, yes/no, right/wrong, and win/lose. Takes 20 minutes to recover. 6 3
4 Emotionally Intelligent People Are able to understand and deal with their own emotions and those of others. Are generally able to control their moods. Easily motivate themselves to overcome obstacles and reach their goals. In general, are more comfortable developing and maintaining relationships. 7 Emotional Intelligence Activity Think of a leader whom you have worked for or with and would gladly work with again. How would you describe that person? Sharing with others, create a list of the most common characteristics or qualities of the leaders you identified. 8 4
5 RECOGNITION SELF Awareness & Perception OTHERS Social Awareness REGULATION Self Management Relationship Management 9 Self Perception: Self Regard: Self respect. Accepting strengths and weaknesses. Confidence. Self Actualization: Persistent attempts to improve. Pursue meaningful life. Emotional Self Awareness: Recognizing and understanding one s own emotions. Differentiate subtleties and causes of emotions. 10 5
6 Self Expression: Emotional Expression: Openly expressing feelings, verbally and non verbally. Assertiveness: Communicating feelings, beliefs, and thoughts openly. Defending personal rights and values appropriately. Independence: Self directed. Takes responsibility for one s own feelings. Completes work autonomously. 11 Interpersonal: Interpersonal Relationships: The skill of developing and maintaining healthy relationships. Empathy: Recognizing, understanding and appreciating how other people feel. Articulating one s understanding of another s perspective. Behaving respectfully. 12 6
7 Those low in recognition components: Have difficulty discriminating between emotions. Exhibit less positive emotions. SELF OTHERS May be emotionally unpredictable. Awareness RECOGNITION & Perception Social Awareness 13 Those high in recognition components: Discriminate between emotions. Gauge intensity of feelings. Are empathetic. Tend to be emotionally predictable. RECOGNITION SELF Awareness & Perception OTHERS Social Awareness 14 7
8 Decision Making: Problem Solving: Finding solutions in emotional situations. Understanding how emotions impact decision making. Reality Testing: Capacity to remain objective. Recognizing when emotions or personal bias are in play. Impulse Control: Resist or delay taking action. Avoiding rash decision making. 15 Stress Management: Flexibility: Adapting emotions, thoughts, and behaviors to unfamiliar or unpredictable circumstances. Stress Tolerance: Coping with stressful or difficult situations. Ability to manage or influence situations in a positive manner. Optimism: Positive attitude. Remaining hopeful and resilient, despite setbacks. 16 8
9 Those who are less skilled in regulation components: Generate emotions that are less appropriate for the task at hand. May be impulsive or become paralyzed. Make untimely decisions. Make inaccurate decisions. 17 Those who are more skilled in regulation components: Generate an emotion that is most appropriate for the task at hand. Flexible. Pragmatic. Perceptive. 18 9
10 Developing Emotional Intelligence Increase capacity in perceiving and expressing emotions. Develop the ability to manage emotions. Process decisions using emotion based information. 19 Developing Emotional Intelligence Increase capacity: Learn to label feelings rather than people or situations: I feel impatient. v. This is ridiculous. I feel afraid. v. You are driving like an idiot. Take responsibility for your feelings: I feel jealous. v. You are making me jealous
11 Developing Emotional Intelligence A leader s ability to evoke specific emotions and accurately match them to a given situation can go a long way toward earning respect and appreciation of the team. Learn the vocabulary of basic emotions: 21 Developing Emotional Intelligence Look Emotion Sound Feel 22 11
12 Developing Emotional Intelligence Manage emotions: People have trouble managing their emotions when their belief systems often get in the way of their ability to think and act rationally: You have just been called into your boss office unexpectedly. What does through your mind? We prepare for how we have interpreted the event, accurately or not. 23 Emotional Intelligence Think of a time when your emotions got the best of you. If you had a chance to go back, how might you have handled the situation differently? 24 12
13 Developing Emotional Intelligence Manage emotions: Activating Event. Beliefs. Consequences. Disputing your beliefs. Effective beliefs. Focus. 25 It s Not About the Nail 26 13
14 Emotional Intelligence in Action Decision making using emotions: Ask yourself insightful questions: What is causing those emotions? Where are they coming from? Grouchy perhaps you had a fight with your mate this morning. Happy maybe you ve heard good things about this workshop. Nervous perhaps someone criticized you publicly yesterday for speaking up. How do you want to feel and how can you get yourself there? What do you need to do to achieve the feeling you want? 27 Personal Improvement Plan The ideas and development opportunities will only be useful if you act on them. Talk with your colleagues and your boss about how your performance might be enhanced by improving your EQ
15 1110 S. College Ave. University of Missouri
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