Winning your audience

Transcription

1 Identify l Influence l Achieve Engaging with Empathy Sarah Hinchliffe Winning your audience The DNA of engagement APMP UK 14th Annual Conference 2016

2 From Aristotle to Krznaric* * Roman Krznaric, whose book Empathy was my inspiration and primary resource for this session 2

3 Empathy defined "Empathy is the art of stepping imaginatively into the shoes of another person, understanding their feelings and perspectives, and using that to guide your actions. Two types of empathy: COGNITIVE and AFFECTIVE Empathy is not the same as: SYMPATHY or COMPASSION 3

4 The rise of homo empathicus The rise and fall of empathy - Centuries old: - Mocassins - te nanoanga - Ubuntu - No man is an island - 98% - Antidote to self - The 4 culprits - No 1 WIIFM - The consumer age - Individualism - Narcissism - Mass empathy collapse The fall into homo-self centricus 4

5 Three reasons empathy matters Improves relationships through understanding Underpins social cultures and moral codes Improves creativity by seeing things from different perspectives 5

6 Habit 1: Switch on your empathetic brain Shifting our mental frameworks to recognise that empathy is at the core of human nature, and that it can be expanded throughout our lives Ground-breaking research The research applied Neuroscience Evolutionary biology Child psychology Roots of Empathy Bedside manners 6

7 Practising Habit 1 Chat in twos or threes and discover examples where you have seen a different perspective, shared a significant emotion or mirrored a feeling Suggestions: Choosing a gift for a friend based on what they like, not what you like (cognitive) Genuinely listening to a friend s problems and showing understanding (affective) Yawning when you see someone yawn (imitation) Flinching when someone is hurt (imitation) Feeling a spider crawling across your skin when you see it on another person (imitation) 7

8 Habit 2: Make the imaginative leap Making a conscious effort to step into other people's shoes - including our "enemies" - and to acknowledge their humanity, individuality and perspectives Four barriers to empathy Breaking down the barriers Prejudice Authority Distance Denial Treat everyone as an individual Treat everyone as human Practice the Platinum rule Know thine enemy 8

9 Practising Habit 2 Chat in twos or threes and discover examples of where you have jumped to a conclusion about someone (no names!) and then come to see them differently Suggestions: Pigeonholing health issues Judging someone by appearance alone (first impressions) Dismissing other people s hobbies as boring Assuming everyone in a certain job has the same personality 9

10 Habit 3: Seek experiential adventures Exploring lives and cultures that contrast with our own through direct immersion, empathetic journeying and social cooperation Immersion to experience prejudice Immersion to experience plight Immersion leading to personal change Beatrice Webb John Howard Griffin Gunther Wallraff George Orwell Patricia Moore Daniel Day Lewis Che Guevara Nelson Mandela 10

11 Practising Habit 3 Chat in twos or threes and discover your own experiential empathy examples or examples you have seen or heard about Suggestions: Dialogue in the dark - emulating the blind Sleeping rough to experience homelessness The Choir DILO (Day in the Life Of) 11

12 Habit 4: Practice the art of conversation Fostering curiosity about strangers and radical listening, and taking off our emotional masks Be a genuine, interested enquirer Foster a sense of curiosity Engage in radical listening Take off your mask 12

13 Practising Habit 4 Chat in pairs and discover three interests that you have in common 13

14 Habit 5: Travel in your armchair Transporting ourselves into other people's minds with the help of art, literature, film and online Armchair empathy" Theatre and film Photography Literature Social media Online games and forums 14

15 Practising Habit 5 Chat in twos or threes about anything you have read, heard or seen that changed your view and/or caused you to take action 15

16 Habit 6: Inspire a revolution Generating empathy on a mass scale to create social change, and extending our empathy skills to embrace the natural world Using collective empathy to effect massive social change Wave 1: pre-wwii Wave 2: post-wwii Wave 3: modern day 16

17 Practising Habit 6 APMP s work bringing together the selling and buying communities 17

18 Empathy in our world Chat in twos and threes and think of a couple things that you can do in capture and/or your proposals to create empathy with the customer 18

19 Empathy in capture 1. Tune in 6. Dare to be different 5. Read Empathy in capture 2. Get to know the buyers 3. Really know your customer 4. Listen 19

20 Empathy in proposals 1. Plan to write with empathy 6. Use vibrant language 5. Thoughtful evidence Empathy in proposals 2. Write for each individual 3. Share stories 4. Show you have listened 20

21 Empathy personified 21

22 Association of Bid and Proposal Management Professionals UK Chapter