The 4 Cornerstones of Self-Confidence By: Kathleen B. Schulweis, CPCC, PCC
The 4 Cornerstones of Self-Confidence "We are the Architects of Our Confidence" (Kathleen Schulweis) If confidence is belief in oneself and one's abilities, then the opposite of confidence is uncertainty and self-doubt. We all experience self-doubt at some point- usually when we are faced with a situation where we feel uncertain about the outcome and fearful of making bad decisions. The question is what will you do with your uncertainty? Will you view it as a springboard of opportunity or allow it to hold you back? As a professional coach who has spent more than 20 years in observation of human behavior, I have worked with hundreds of people in need of selfconfidence who have found it by using the 4 Cornerstones of Confidence. Not that there s anything mysterious about the 4 Cornerstones of Self- Confidence. In fact, they are so simple you may find yourself saying, Of course, I know that! But there s a big difference between knowing something and feeling confident in the application of it. You have to expect things of yourself before you can do them. (Michael Jordan)
Confidence is a balance of 4 important elements: trust, learning, support and action. I call them cornerstones because they are the foundation for all other actions. If you are experiencing uncertainty and self-doubt, then read on to find out how you too can benefit from the 4 Cornerstones of Self-Confidence. The simple but powerful cornerstones are as follows: #1 Trust Yourself Trust is the state of readiness for unguarded interaction with someone or something. (Dr. D.C. Tway, Jr.) With trust you are able to accept the value of your mistakes and embrace them as a learning experience. What small action can you take today that would encourage you to trust yourself? #2 Know Yourself Who are you? As human beings, we are driven by two guiding principles - our needs and values. Oftentimes we can determine what our values are by identifying that which ignites our passion or sense of purpose. Who you are is grounded by your values. What ignites your passion? Who does that make you as a person?
#3 Support Yourself Without positive support it is nearly impossible to build and maintain selfconfidence. Are you supporting yourself? Observe your thoughts, and see if you can identify the inner critic as well as your inner champion. Then, nurture the champion and disregard the critic. Find family and friends who support your dreams and efforts. Who are the allies that encourage and stand by you? #4 Motivate Yourself Day-to-day productivity in service of yourself is critical for success because that is the action that moves you forward. Are you focusing on your goals? Take small steps toward them every day. What action could you take today that would instill a sense of satisfaction and increase your self-confidence? Action conquers fear. Peter Nivio Zarlenga
The 4 Cornerstones of Self-Confidence is a product of Kathleen Schulweis, Professional Certified Coach, and Confidence Connections If you would like to learn more about these confidence-building strategies, we invite you to sign up for the teleclass series, Handling Conflict with Confidence. This 4-part series was designed for those wishing to build a stronger foundation for personal change. For more information, contact Kathleen Schulweis directly: kathleen@confidenceconnections.com Infuse your life with confidence: Subscribe to our Electronic Magazine and Blog and stay up-to-date on the latest research and programs. Thank you for your confidence in us. Wishing you great success in all your endeavors! Confidence Connections is a full-service coaching and consulting company. We offer on-site corporate training, individual and group coaching and tele-classes. 323-935-6477