DA HOW Recovery from Compulsive Spending Group #1528, Wednesday 7:30 to 8:30 pm EST Updated format as of January 3, 2018 Dial- in Number: 712-775- 7035 Participant Access Code: 295072 Leader Access Code: 590144 NOTES FOR LEADER (Remember to cancel call waiting before dialing in if on landline usually *70) *5 mutes the line - Listen to the prompt each time 1st time hitting *5 will mute and allow callers to press *6 to unmute 2nd time hitting *5 will mute and callers cannot unmute 3rd time hitting *5 will unmute everyone This meeting format can also be found at: dahowintergroup.weebly.com ************************************************************************ WEEK ONE OF EACH MONTH FORMAT UPDATE AS OF JANUARY 2018 LEADER BEGINS HERE FOR ALL OTHER WEEKS OF THE MONTH PLEASE SCROLL DOWN TO NEXT SECTION LEADER BEGIN READING HERE Welcome to the Wednesday evening DA HOW Recovery from Compulsive Spending Meeting. My name is. I am a compulsive debtor and spender and your leader for this meeting. The Business Meeting is held on the first Wednesday of the month, which is tonight, after the end of the meeting. The format of this meeting has been streamlined to provide the maximum opportunity for sharing the solution through personal experience. We also encourage those who are new or who may be struggling to speak, as well. Serenity Prayer: To open the meeting, let us have a moment of quiet meditation followed by the Serenity Prayer: God, grant me the Serenity to accept the things I cannot change, the Courage to change the things I can, and the Wisdom to know the difference. Phone meeting etiquette: I will now cycle us through to ensure a quiet meeting ] [Leader cycles through by pressing *5 to mute the line so that participants may unmute themselves. As a reminder, press *6 on your phone keypad to mute and to unmute. Please keep your phone muted when you aren t speaking. Thank you.
Is there a DA HOW sponsor who would be willing to share for 3 minutes on how they work their day- to- day program of recovery in DA HOW? I will time you. Leader says: As of January 2018, we are implementing a format change, which we will try out for 3 months and then have a group conscience at the April Business meeting to evaluate whether to continue this format change. On the first week of each month, we will read the Step of the Month from the 12 Steps of Debtors Anonymous. You can find the Steps in the 12 Step Booklet or the 12 Steps, 12 Traditions and 12 Concepts of Debtors Anonymous book. We will read the Step in its entirety and then open the meeting to shares from those on the call. We will continue sharing until approximately 8:20 pm Eastern Time. Following the close of the meeting, we will hold our monthly business meeting, which everyone is welcome to attend. Leader says: We will now begin reading Step. We will need about volunteers to share the reading (count the number of pages and ask for about that many volunteers). Would anyone be willing to start the reading? Leader says: We will now open the meeting up for sharing. Everyone is welcome to share and you may leave your contact information after you finish speaking, if you would like to do so. Before we start sharing, is there someone who would be willing to be our spiritual timekeeper tonight? (Leader will thank the person who volunteers). We will have three- minute shares with a one- minute warning. Please acknowledge the timekeeper when they give the one- minute warning. Also, please give me the opportunity to thank the last person who just finished speaking before you request to share. Thank you. Who would like to share? (Continue sharing until about 8:20 pm Eastern Time.) Are there any DA Announcements? Leader reads about our Seventh Tradition:
D.A. has no dues or fees. We are self- supporting through our own contributions so we pass the virtual basket. Please give as generously as you can. You can donate directly from your bank account on the DA website at debtorsanonymous.org. You can also find DA s address there if you would like to mail in a check. Please put Group #1528 on your check. For all who may be new to DA HOW or to this meeting, welcome. Please stay on after the meeting as there will be a newcomer greeter who will stay on after the Business Meeting to welcome you and answer any questions you may have. Is there a DA How Sponsor would be willing to be the Newcomer Greeter tonight? If no one answers, Leader reads: Is there a DA HOW sponsor who would be willing to leave their phone number for newcomers to call? At approximately 8:25 pm ET, Leader says: It is now time for us to begin closing our meeting. There will be a newcomer greeter who will stay on after the meeting. Leader asks: Would someone please read the Promises of Debtors Anonymous? (revised Aug 2013) PROMISES OF DEBTORS ANONYMOUS - (revised August 2013) In the program of Debtors Anonymous, we come together to share our journey in recovering from compulsive debting. There is hope. In working D.A.'s Twelve Steps, we develop new ways of living. When we work D.A.'s Twelve Steps and use D.A.'s Tools, we begin to receive these gifts of the program: 1. Where once we felt despair, we will experience a newfound hope. 2. Clarity will replace vagueness. Confidence and intuition will replace confusion and chaos. We will live engaged lives, make decisions that best meet our needs, and become the people we were meant to be. 3. We will live within our means, yet our means will not define us. 4. We will begin to live a prosperous life, unencumbered by fear, worry, resentment, or debt. 5. We will realize that we are enough; we will value ourselves and our contributions. 6. Isolation will give way to fellowship; faith will displace fear. 7. We will recognize that there is enough; our resources will be generous and we will share them with others and with D.A. 8. We will cease to compare ourselves to others; jealousy and envy will fade. 9. Acceptance and gratitude will replace regret, self- pity and longing. 10. We will no longer fear the truth; we will move from hiding in denial to living in reality. 11. Honesty will guide our actions toward a rich life filled with meaning and purpose. 12. We will recognize a Power greater than ourselves as the source of our abundance. We will ask for help and guidance and have faith that they will come. All this and more is possible. When we work this program with integrity and to the best of our ability, one day at a time, a life of prosperity and serenity will be ours.
Leader reads closing statement and leads Serenity Prayer: In closing, we ask that you respect our tool of anonymity which allows us freedom of expression by assuring us that we say at meetings or to other DA members at any time will not be repeated. Thank you for allowing me to be your leader for this meeting. I would also like to thank all those who participated and provided service. After a moment s meditation, will those who wish to please join me in the Serenity Prayer: God, grant me the Serenity to accept the things I cannot change, the Courage to change the things I can, and the Wisdom to know the difference. We will now have our Business Meeting. Everyone is welcome to stay and participate. Is there a DA HOW sponsor who would be willing to lead the Business Meeting? The Newcomer Greeter will be on the call after the Business Meeting concludes, which will be in approximately 15 minutes. BUSINESS MEETING FORMAT o Open with we version of the Serenity Prayer o Read Minutes from last month s meeting! Ask for Motion to Approve or Amend Minutes (sometimes it is easier to ask Is there anyone opposed to approving these Minutes, than to take an Aye Nay vote). o Old Business! Follow- up on agenda items left unfinished from previous meeting! Ask for volunteers for all service positions (when needed)! Meeting Leader! Business Meeting Leader! Business Meeting Secretary! Timekeeper! Newcomer Greeter o New Business o Close with Serenity Prayer
ALL OTHER WEEKS OF THE MONTH LEADER BEGINS HERE LEADER BEGIN READING HERE Welcome to the Wednesday evening DA HOW Recovery from Compulsive Spending Meeting. My name is. I am a compulsive debtor and spender and your leader for this meeting. The Business Meeting is held on the first Wednesday of the month after the end of the meeting. The format of this meeting has been streamlined to provide the maximum opportunity for sharing the solution through personal experience. We also encourage those who are new or who may be struggling to speak, as well. Serenity Prayer: To open the meeting, let us have a moment of quiet meditation followed by the Serenity Prayer: God, grant me the Serenity to accept the things I cannot change, the Courage to change the things I can, and the Wisdom to know the difference. Phone meeting etiquette: I will now cycle us through to ensure a quiet meeting ] [Leader cycles through by pressing *5 to mute the line so that participants may unmute themselves. As a reminder, press *6 on your phone keypad to mute and to unmute. Please keep your phone muted when you aren t speaking. Thank you. Is there someone who could read the summary of What is Compulsive Spending? These comments are adapted from the DA Conference- Approved Pamphlets: Debtors Anonymous and Recovery from Compulsive Spending. What is Compulsive Spending? Compulsive spending can be explained as an action we take in response to a feeling of having to spend. Commonly, it is a need to spend in order to consciously or unconsciously avoid an uncomfortable feeling. When we spend despite a decision or desire not to, or spend to our own detriment, we are spending compulsively.
A common characteristic of compulsive spenders is that we live our lives based on what others think of us. We believe that our value lies in what we own and how we look. As compulsive spenders, we have fallen into patterns of spending that do not satisfy our real needs. We may have spent impulsively, incurred debt, felt guilty, promised never to do it again, and only repeated the same cycle the next time the feeling of not enough came up. Having overspent, we often had nothing to show for it and wondered where all that money went. Some compulsive spenders are not actually in debt, but they are still welcome in DA. The only requirement for membership in Debtors Anonymous is a desire to stop incurring unsecured debt. Leader asks: Is there anyone who can read the summary of What is DA HOW from THIS meeting s format? What is DA HOW? H.O.W. is a movement within Debtors Anonymous whose basic principle is that abstinence is the only means to freedom from compulsive debting, spending and underearning and the beginning of a spiritual life. The Debtors Anonymous H.O.W. meeting offers the compulsive debtor, spender and/or underearner a disciplined and structured approach. The D.A. H.O.W. group supports the belief that our disease is absolute and therefore only absolute acceptance of the D.A. program will offer any sustained abstinence to those of us whose compulsion has reached a critical level. Therefore, the concepts of a spending plan, steps, traditions, and tools of recovery are not suggestions: rather we accept them as requirements for our recovery. We practice dedication to the concept of remaining Honest, Open- minded and Willing to listen. This is the H.O.W. of the program. Is there a DA HOW sponsor who would be willing to share for 3 minutes on how they work their day- to- day program of recovery in DA HOW? I will time you. Will all DA HOW sponsors, please un- mute by pressing *6 and state only: Your name and contact information How long you have been abstinent in DA H.O.W. If you have time available for sponsoring And, as a gentle reminder, we do not repeat contact information, so please have a pen and paper handy! Are there any DA Announcements?
Leader reads about our Seventh Tradition: D.A. has no dues or fees. We are self- supporting through our own contributions so we pass the virtual basket. Please give as generously as you can. You can donate directly from your bank account on the DA website at debtorsanonymous.org. You can also find DA s address there if you would like to mail in a check. Please put Group #1528 on your check. If it is the first Wednesday of the month, Leader reads: This is the first Wednesday of the month and we will have a business meeting following the meeting. Step- ups and Anniversaries At this point in our meeting we ask the group to join us as we celebrate step ups and anniversaries. We celebrate when a member has achieved at least 30 days of continuous back- to- back abstinence in DA HOW and has answered the first 30 DA HOW questions. Are there any DA HOW members stepping up tonight? OR - It looks like there are no step- ups this evening please keep coming back! Are there any DA HOW members celebrating an Anniversary tonight? (If so, congratulate the DA HOW member on their anniversary and read the anniversary reading it can be found at the end of this document scroll down to the last page). For all who may be new to DA HOW or to this meeting, welcome. Please stay on after the meeting as there will be a newcomer greeter who will welcome you and answer any questions you may have. Is there a DA How Sponsor would be willing to be the Newcomer Greeter tonight? If no one answers, Leader reads: Is there a DA HOW sponsor who would be willing to leave their phone number for newcomers to call? Leader Reads: Before we begin reading from the Recovery from Compulsive Spending Pamphlet, would someone volunteer to be the spiritual time- keeper tonight? We will need someone to time three- minute shares, which will begin after each reading. (If someone volunteers, thank them). Leader Reads: After each reading, we will have open sharing. We will ask the reader if he or she would like to share on what they have just read, and then open the meeting to anyone else who would like to share. Please keep your share to three minutes. The timekeeper will give you a one minute warning. We will now begin reading from the DA CONFERENCE- APPROVED RECOVERY FROM COMPULSIVE SPENDING PAMPHLET. This pamphlet is available for
purchase from Debtors Anonymous. All relevant ordering information is available on the DA website. You may also be able to purchase the pamphlet at a face- to- face DA meeting. We will read three paragraphs from the pamphlet before opening up for sharing. Does anyone know where we left off? (IF NOT: whoever volunteers to read can choose to start wherever) Is there a volunteer who would like to READ? Thank you. (If no volunteers, the leader can start the reading). After the first reader has finished reading 3 paragraphs, Leader reads: Thank you for reading,. Would you like to share? Leader: (After someone has shared, thank them for sharing.) You can continue the sharing by asking, Would anyone else like to share? If there is a lull in the sharing, you can ask for a volunteer to continue reading the pamphlet where the last reader left off. At approximately 8:25 pm ET, Leader says: It is now time for us to begin closing our meeting. There will be a newcomer greeter who will stay on after the meeting. Leader asks: Would someone please read the Promises of Debtors Anonymous? (revised Aug 2013) PROMISES OF DEBTORS ANONYMOUS - (revised August 2013) In the program of Debtors Anonymous, we come together to share our journey in recovering from compulsive debting. There is hope. In working D.A.'s Twelve Steps, we develop new ways of living. When we work D.A.'s Twelve Steps and use D.A.'s Tools, we begin to receive these gifts of the program: 1. Where once we felt despair, we will experience a newfound hope. 2. Clarity will replace vagueness. Confidence and intuition will replace confusion and chaos. We will live engaged lives, make decisions that best meet our needs, and become the people we were meant to be. 3. We will live within our means, yet our means will not define us. 4. We will begin to live a prosperous life, unencumbered by fear, worry, resentment, or debt. 5. We will realize that we are enough; we will value ourselves and our contributions. 6. Isolation will give way to fellowship; faith will displace fear. 7. We will recognize that there is enough; our resources will be generous and we will share them with others and with D.A. 8. We will cease to compare ourselves to others; jealousy and envy will fade. 9. Acceptance and gratitude will replace regret, self- pity and longing. 10. We will no longer fear the truth; we will move from hiding in denial to living in reality. 11. Honesty will guide our actions toward a rich life filled with meaning and purpose.
12. We will recognize a Power greater than ourselves as the source of our abundance. We will ask for help and guidance and have faith that they will come. All this and more is possible. When we work this program with integrity and to the best of our ability, one day at a time, a life of prosperity and serenity will be ours. Leader reads closing statement and leads Serenity Prayer: In closing, we ask that you respect our tool of anonymity which allows us freedom of expression by assuring us that we say at meetings or to other DA members at any time will not be repeated. Thank you for allowing me to be your leader for this meeting. I would also like to thank all those who participated and provided service. After a moment s meditation, will those who wish to please join me in the Serenity Prayer: God, grant me the Serenity to accept the things I cannot change, the Courage to change the things I can, and the Wisdom to know the difference. Anniversary Reading (Reprinted from The Twelve Steps and Twelve Traditions of Alcoholics Anonymous, pages 111-112, with permission of A.A. World Services, Inc.) We read this excerpt from the A.A. Twelve and Twelve in honor of those celebrating consecutive years of back- to- back abstinence or solvency in Debtors Anonymous. To respect A.A. s request that we do not modify their literature, we read this passage exactly as it appears, privately substituting compulsive debtor for alcoholic and D.A. for A.A. Now comes the biggest question yet. What about the practice of these principles in all our affairs? Can we love the whole pattern of living as eagerly as we do the small segment of it that we discover when we try to help other alcoholic achieve sobriety? Can we bring the same spirit of love and tolerance into our sometimes deranged family lives that we bring to our AA group? Can we have the same kind of confidence and faith in these people who have been infected and sometimes crippled by our own illness that we have in our sponsors? Can we actually carry the AA spirit into our daily work? Can we meet our newly recognized responsibilities to the world at large? And can we bring new purpose and devotion to the religion of our choice? Can we find a new joy of living in trying to do something about all these things? Furthermore, how shall we come to terms with seeming failure or success? Can we now accept and adjust to either without despair or pride? Can we accept poverty, sickness, loneliness, and bereavement with courage and serenity? Can we steadfastly content ourselves with the humbler, yet sometimes more durable, satisfactions when the brighter more glittering achievements are denied us? The AA answer to these questions about living is Yes, all of these things are possible. We know this because we see monotony, pain, and even calamity turned to good use by those who keep on trying to practice AA's Twelve Steps. And if these are facts of life for the many alcoholics who have recovered in AA, they can become the facts of life for many more.