My Thinking & Talking about Others Workbook

My Thinking & Talking about Others Workbook

This workbook is designed for young people who find it difficult to understand that other people have knowledge, thoughts, desires and feelings that are different to their own, and to take a guess at what they might be. As a result, it is difficult for them to make predictions about other people. It might seem that they are not always taking other people s perspective into account. These young people might benefit from a chance to practice using the language that we use to talk about other people s (and our own) desires, knowledge, thoughts, and feelings. Ideas in this workbook came from the Hanen, Talkability programme and from the work of Michelle Garcia Winner & Social Thinking. Important Language to Model while using the workbook I m not sure but I guess maybe probably perhaps thinks likes wants prefers knows/doesn t know feels wishes believes hopes Contents: 1. People like and dislike different things 2. People want different things 3. When we know what people like and dislike, and what they want, we can take a guess at what they might do 4. Faces and tone of voice help us to guess how people feel. We all feel a range of emotions. 5. People who are together sometimes feel differently. We can sometimes take a guess at why they feel that way by looking for clues. 6. People don t know about things unless they ve seen them happen or someone tells them about it. 7. Using all our skills activities.

Tips for teachers and parents This workbook is not to be completed independently by the young person. The student and an adult helper should complete the activities together. In some cases, it may work well for the adult helper to work with two or three students together. It is not necessary to fill in the thought and speech bubbles with text but some students might like to fill them in as they go. Some students tire easily from writing however so it is fine for the adult to be the scribe and write down the student s suggestions. All day long we are taking guesses at how people are thinking and feeling. The helper is likely to be more experienced at guessing than the student, but nobody is sure all the time. As a result, the helper should try to gently suggest alternatives but also take on board the student s ideas. Practising guessing is useful, even if we are not always correct, so don t insist on correcting the student all the time. Useful phrases might include: It could be that yes! Or, looking at his eyes, could it be? I m not sure but I m guessing he. This is a tricky one. You think and I think. Hmmmm. Let s ask some other people for their ideas. I see why you thought that! Good guess! Support the student to continue to pay attention to social information in real life. Support him or her to notice other people and continue guessing aloud and using the target language as a model. Books & Movies that the young person is interested in are great opportunities for carrying over the target language and discussion. When reading a book or watching a video, pause for discussion. Use a blank page to cover most of the pictures so you are looking at one at a time. Go through the workbook at a pace that suits the student. Keep sessions short & sweet. You are TEACHING not TESTING! Avoid turning the workbook into a long assessment by taking turns and modelling responses yourself. Explain why you gave your answer.

1. Like or dislike? What are they thinking? Like/don t like? Would you feel the same way? I don t like These vegetables yuck!

Imagine what they are thinking (like/don t like) and what they might say! I like these Oranges! Mom, can I have this for breakfast again tomorrow?

Like/Don t like survey Carry out a survey with 4 people & also fill in for yourself. Put a tick to show if they like or don t like the item. Ask: Do you like? Your name: Like Don t Like Like Don t Like Like Don t Like Like Don t Like Like Don t Like Like Don t Like 1 st person s name: 2 nd person s name: 3 rd person s name: 4 th person s name: What was the most popular? But a circle around the one/s most people liked: swimming cats Pokémon hot chocolate soup x-box

Make your own Like/Don t like survey Write or draw the things you are going to find out about. Your name: Like Don t Like Like Don t Like Like Don t Like Like Don t Like Like Don t Like Like Don t Like 1 st person s name: 2 nd person s name: 3 rd person s name: 4 th person s name: What was the most popular? What was the least popular?

2. What do they want? When taking a guess look closely at the people s eyes. When someone is looking at something they are thinking about it! Helper tip: Take a turn and explain your guesses, e.g. The boy is looking at the cake. I can tell that he is thinking about the cake. I can guess that he wants the cake and not the apple. When the student takes a guess ask How do you know? Reiterate that the clue is in the eyes! I want the cake!

Carry out a survey with 3 people. Don t forget to complete for yourself! Ask them: What would you choose? Put a circle around their answer. Your name: Person no. 1: or or or or or or Person no. 2: Person no. 3: or or or or or or

3. Guessing intentions When we are fairly sure about what people like & want, we can begin to guess what they will do. Revisit the pictures above and support the young person to guess what the people will do next. Model to the student how you can now take a guess at what the person might do, and begin to predict what might happen: e.g. I think that man wants the cake. I think he is probably going to eat the cake and not the apple. Demonstrate that there may be more than one possibility and that s fine! If it helps draw a diagram like this to think of more than one possibility: I think this boy doesn t like his vegetables He ll probably eat them so he doesn t get in trouble. Maybe then he ll get ice cream for desert Maybe he ll throw them out the window when his mom goes to another room.

Guessing Intentions Weekend Activities Ask three people to rate these weekend activities. They can put No. 1 next to the thing they most like to do at the weekend and carry on with 2,3.. Person s name: Person s name: Person s name: Now that you have this information, what do you think the three people are likely to do this weekend?

Gathering information on how people like to spend their free time Complete the survey with three people. What are the top three things they like to do with their free time? What s an activity they don t like doing? Perhaps the activities are similar to the previous page but maybe they re different. Remember to complete a grid for yourself! Person #1: Person#2: Person #3: Me 1 1 1 1 2 2 2 2 3 3 3 3 Something I don t enjoy doing in my free time:

Predicting if someone is wants to continue a conversation or if they are going to finish it soon As we learned above, usually when someone is looking at something they are also thinking about it. In a conversation, this is also true. When someone is interested in what another person has to say, their body and face is usually turned in their direction. They are listening to the other person and thinking about them and what they are saying so they look in their direction. The people in this picture below are interested in what the other person has to say. Maybe they are talking about a Netflix show they both saw. They are looking in the direction of the other person. They are thinking about the other person and what they are saying. We can tell from their eyes and body language that they are enjoying the conversation and want it to continue. When someone looks away from the person who is talking sometimes this means they are thinking of something else. Maybe they are thinking I m not interested in this conversation or maybe they are thinking of something else they have to do or somewhere else they have to go. In this picture, one man looks away and looks at his watch. He is maybe not thinking about the other man at the moment. He is maybe thinking about something else he has to do so he checks the time. The man on the right knows that the conversation may be coming to an end soon.

Have a look at these pictures with your helper. Are the people looking at the speaker and thinking about them? When they are this means they are probably interested and want to hear more. Are the people looking away from the speaker? Maybe they are thinking about something else. Maybe they are bored of the conversation. Maybe they want a turn to speak. Maybe they have something else to do. Take a guess: WHAT MIGHT THEY DO NEXT?

Activities to support paying attention to social information 1. Hide something in the room and tell the student where it is only by directing with your eyes. You can make the game more challenging over time but be sure that the student experiences success with relative ease early on. Use gesture to augment your eye-pointing if the student is having a hard time. In time, give the student a chance to hide something on you and direct you where to go with his/her eyes. Another adult can help the student to hide the item if needs be. ***This is an important step when teaching the student that people don t know about something when they haven t seen it happening (coming up later!) You can emphasise that the student has the knowledge but you don t: You know where it is but I don t know! Can you give me clues? Now we both know where it is! Who still doesn t know where it is? (i.e. Someone who is in a different room) 2. In a small group, play Wink Murder to support the student getting used to paying attention to other people s eyes. 3. Try playing Ted s ice-cream Adventure online at http://www.whizkidgames.com. 4. Take turns holding up two snacks or drinks. People can only tell you what they want by using their eyes no words or body movements allowed! 5. Play mind reading. Ensure there are items around the room such as your lunch box, a clock, a bottle of water, a photograph, your phone, a timetable. Ask the students to guess what you are thinking about. Simply look at an item and explain that they need to follow your gaze to the item. Then they know what you are thinking about. Help the students to expand on their guesses, e.g. Yes, I m thinking about the timetable. What do you think I might want to figure out? or Yes, I m looking at my phone and thinking about whether X called or not. 6. Say the alphabet. In a group, the teacher looks at the students in turn and they say the next letter of the alphabet until it s complete. 7. Counting ping pong. In a group count to twenty. When one person says a number they look at another person to let them know they should say the next number. 8. Silly story. In a group, start a silly story and have other people carry it on. The teacher looks at the person speaking but when he/she looks to another person the first person must stop talking and the next person takes over. As a reminder the teacher can say I m looking at X and thinking about X and I want X to go next. In this way, everyone must pay attention to his/her eyes. Story starter ideas: It was a cold rainy morning and Jim was late for school The dinosaur plodded down the road towards the city. In the middle of the night, Julie was woken up by a sound outside.. If it is hard for the students to think up what to say for a story, simply ask them to think in advance of a topic they are going to share with the group. Challenge them to keep talking until you look at someone else.

3. How do the people feel? We can guess by paying attention to their faces. Are they SAD, DISGUSTED, WORRIED, ANGRY or HAPPY? Top tip! Disgusted and angry can look similar. You can get wrinkles on your forehead and a small mouth with both. When people are disgusted (when you say Yuck!) their nose often gets wrinkles, or there are wrinkles to the side of the nose! This doesn t happen when people are angry. With your partners help imagine why they might be feeling that way! I m feeling disgusted!

SAD, DISGUSTED, WORRIED, ANGRY or HAPPY?

SAD, DISGUSTED, WORRIED, ANGRY or HAPPY?

SAD, DISGUSTED, WORRIED, ANGRY or HAPPY? Extend the activity Tone of voice is another clue about how people feel. Take turns saying what the people are thinking with the corresponding voice, e.g. I feel happy ; Check out Robbie the Robot game for more practice: http://www.whizkidgames.com/?game=robbie

We all feel calm, cross, worried, sad and happy at times. Carry out this survey with 4 people from home and school. You can fill in the boxes or let the person write in them. They might prefer to draw than write! Don t forget to complete it for yourself. Person #1 Name: Tell me about a time you feel calm What makes you feel this way? Tell me about a time you feel cross What makes you feel this way? What helps you feel better at these times? Tell me about a time you feel worried What makes you feel this way? What helps you feel better at these times? Tell me about a time you feel sad What makes you feel this way? What helps you feel better at these times? Tell me about a time you feel happy What makes you feel this way?

Person #2 Name: Tell me about a time you feel calm What makes you feel this way? Tell me about a time you feel cross What makes you feel this way? What helps you feel better at these times? Tell me about a time you feel worried What makes you feel this way? What helps you feel better at these times? Tell me about a time you feel sad What makes you feel this way? What helps you feel better at these times? Tell me about a time you feel happy What makes you feel this way?

Person #3 Name: Tell me about a time you feel calm What makes you feel this way? Tell me about a time you feel cross What makes you feel this way? What helps you feel better at these times? Tell me about a time you feel worried What makes you feel this way? What helps you feel better at these times? Tell me about a time you feel sad What makes you feel this way? What helps you feel better at these times? Tell me about a time you feel happy What makes you feel this way?

Person # 4 Name: Tell me about a time you feel calm What makes you feel this way? Tell me about a time you feel cross What makes you feel this way? What helps you feel better at these times? Tell me about a time you feel worried What makes you feel this way? What helps you feel better at these times? Tell me about a time you feel sad What makes you feel this way? What helps you feel better at these times? Tell me about a time you feel happy What makes you feel this way?

Person # 5 Name: Tell me about a time you feel calm What makes you feel this way? Tell me about a time you feel cross What makes you feel this way? What helps you feel better at these times? Tell me about a time you feel worried What makes you feel this way? What helps you feel better at these times? Tell me about a time you feel sad What makes you feel this way? What helps you feel better at these times? Tell me about a time you feel happy What makes you feel this way?

4. People who are together sometimes feel differently. In the pictures below, the people are all feeling the same feeling. How are they feeling? Can you guess why they are feeling this way? In the picture below, the girl and mother are feeling differently. It looks like the girl is feeling sad and the mother is feeling cross. Maybe the girl did something bold and the mother is giving out to her.

Discuss the pictures below with your helper! The ladies are feeling differently. One lady is happy and the other lady is not. Look at the eyes of the lady in blue. What is she thinking about? What does she want? Look at the eyes of the girl with her hair down. How does she feel? What is she thinking about? What does she want? How will she feel if she gets it? How are the three people feeling? Discuss.

How are the ladies feeling? Discuss The children are feeling differently. The boy does not like the sound. Can you guess what he wants? Can you guess what he may do? How is the lady feeling? What is she thinking about? The man must have made a good choice of present. He must have chosen something that he knew she likes.

How are the boys feeling? What is the little boy in the stripy top thinking about? What might he do next? How is the man feeling? What does is the lady thinking about? What does she want? How are the boys feeling? Why? What does the big boy want?

What is the man thinking about? Is the lady thinking about the same thing? How are they feeling? Why? (refer to like/dislike, want/doesn t want) What is the lady thinking about? How does she feel? Why? (refer to like/dislike) What are the man and woman thinking about? How do the man and woman feel?

6. Seeing is knowing The man has a surprise for the lady. He knows that she likes dogs so he bought her a puppy. He hopes she will be very happy! He knows about the puppy because he chose it and bought it. The lady does not know about the puppy. She hasn t seen it and the man hasn t told her. The man is covering her eyes. When he takes his hands away she will see her surprise. Then they will both know what it is. Who knows about the flowers? What might the lady be thinking? Who knows what is in the box? How is the boy feeling? The mom bought the boy a Lego set. Why did she buy that? What does she know about the boy and Lego?

Who knows what is in the box? What is the girl in the blue shirt thinking about? What is the girl with the headband thinking about? Who knows what is in the box? Who knows what is in the box? The boy loves Lego. The mum loves chocolates. What is in the box?

Who knows about the flowers? Why did the man buy flowers? What does he know about the lady and flowers? Who knows what s wrapped up? The mother likes books about cooking. The boy likes books about space. What kind of book is wrapped up? Sarah and the teacher are at school. The teacher is cross with Sarah. Who knows about this? The teacher Sarah Sarah s classmates Sarah s mom

Audrey is at school. Her teacher is very happy with Audrey! Who knows about this? The teacher Audrey Audrey s classmates Audrey s dad Rory looked in his bag. He saw that he forgot his lunch. His teacher doesn t know because she didn t look in his bag. What does Rory need to do? Sam thinks his work is very hard. He is stuck. His teacher doesn t know that Sam is stuck. What does Sam need to do?

Using all our skills - Shopping List Activity Make a shopping list for yourself, your helper and two or three other people (maybe a mix of home and school people). The shopping list can be real, i.e. you are really going to go out and get the items. Or the shopping list can be imaginary, which means there is no limit to the money you can spend! Work with your helper to consider all the people you are shopping for. Important language you might use: I think she likes He likes and but his favourite is. I don t know what likes. How can we find out? I know she likes both of those. Let s ask her which one she prefers. How will they feel when you give them? I like but I won t get them for him. He doesn t like. You like but I don t think she does. I know she really wants another. Don t show your shopping list or tell him that we are going. Does he know what he is going to get? No! It will be a surprise when we give him. I think he will be happy! Helper tip: Later re-emphasise that certain other people don t know what you ve bought. Repeat this activity a few times to give the student a chance to put all his/her skills into practice!

Using our skills: Let s make a guess what would they like to talk about? People like to talk about the things that they love and that make them happy. While completing this workbook you have gathered information about some people. You have information about what they like to do at the weekend, what makes them feel happy and calm. This information is really useful to have in order to start a successful conversation! With your helper, write down some of the information you ve gathered about a person below. The person s name: What do I know about them? Write the info around the figure below. Plan out and rehearse a conversation with this person and then have a go in real life! Repeat for other people. Helper tip: Be sure that YOU complete this activity about the learner! What do you now know about him/her? Start a conversation with them about their interests. In a group, support learners to complete the activity about each other.