TODAY I HAVE GIVEN YOU THE CHOICE BETWEEN LIFE AND DEATH, BETWEEN BLESSINGS AND CURSES. NOW I CALL ON heaven and 1 earth to witness the choice you make. Oh that you would choose life so that you and your descendants might live! Deuteronomy 30:19 LIFE YOU CHOOSE DEATH FREE INDEED!
FOR OUT OF THE ABUNDANCE OF THE HEART, THE MOUTH SPEAKS. MATTHEW 12:34 This is a principle. Get ready for the words you speak to represent your new way of thinking, it is a powerful combination God has designed to produce lasting results in your life. It is time for us to take control of our lives by taking control of our thoughts. Too many people have lived below God s ultimate plan for their lives long enough! That s all about to change, as we begin to walk in the victorious life God has intended. 2
SKILLS AND STRATEGIES IN MANAGING AND COPING AND CHANGING BAD HABITS. Skill 1: KNOW THE TRIGGERS-past and present. Skill 2: BE AWARE of depressed thoughts and beliefs. :I don t care; I m worthless; what s the use. Skill 3: CHANGE depressed thoughts and beliefs. Skill 4: TAKE ACTION Take charge of your life. LET GOD Be in control. Triggers are people, places and things. Replace your negative thoughts with GOD S WORD.
FOR WIFE OR GIRLFRIEND I AM A WOMAN OF NOBLE CHARACTER. I AM WORTH FAR MORE THAN RUBIES. HE HAS FULL CONFIDENCE IN ME THAT I WILL BRING HIM GOOD, NOT HARM. PROVERBS 31;10-12 (NIV). I OPEN MY MOUTH WITH SKILLFUL AND GODLY WISDOM, AND ON MY TONGUE IS THE LAW OF KINDNESS. PROVERBS31:26 4
FOR HUSBAND OR BOYFRIEND I GIVE HONOR TO MY WIFE (GIRLFRIEND). I TREAT HER WITH UNDERSTANDING. SHE MAY BE WEAKER THAN I AM, BUT SHE IS MY EQUAL PARTNER IN GOD S GIFT OF NEW LIFE. IF I DON T TREAT HER AS I SHOULD, MY PRAYERS WILL NOT BE HEARD. 1 PETER 3:7 (NLT) I CONFESS MY FAULTS TO MY WIFE/GIRLFRIEND AND WE PRAY FOR ONEANOTHER, THAT WE MAY BE HEALED. THE EFFECTUAL FERVENT PRAYER OF A RIGHTEOUS MAN AVAILETH MUCH. JAMES 5:16 (KJV) 5
ANGER I AM NOT A HOT-TEMPERED PERSON WHO STIRS UP STRIFE, BUT I AM SLOW TO ANGER, APPEASING CONTENTION. PROVERBS 15:18 GOOD SENSE MAKES ME RESTRAIN MY ANGER, AND IT IS MY GLORY TO OVERLOOK A TRANSGRESSION OR AN OFFENSE. PROVERBS 19;11 I AM NOT QUICK IN SPIRIT TO BE ANGRY OR VEXED, FOR ANGER AND VEXATION LODGE IN THE BOSOM OF FOOLS. ECCLESIASTES 7;9 6
DEPRESSION THE LORD GOES BEFORE ME; HE WILL (MARCH) WITH ME; HE WILL NOT FAIL ME OR LET ME GO OR FORSAKE ME; I WILL FEAR NOT, NEITHER BECOME BROKEN 9IN SPIRIT DEPRESSED, DISMAYED, AND UNNERVED WITH ALARM DEUTERONOMY 31:8 GOD IS MY SHIELD AND THE LIFTER OF MY HEAD. PSALM 3:3 WHY ARE YOU DOWN IN THE DUMPS, DEAR SOUL/ WHY ARE YOU CRYING THE BLUES? I FIX MY EYES ON GOD AND SOON I WILL BE PRAISING AGAIN. HE PUTS A SMILE ON MY FACE. HE IS MY GOD. PSALM 42;5 (THE MESSAGE) 7
MY CROSS OVER I WILL ARISE FROM THE CIRCUMSTANCES THAT HAVE KEPT ME --- I WILL ARISE TO A NEW LIFE! I SHINE (AM RADIANT WITH THE GLORY OF THE LORD, FOR MY LIGHT HAS COME, AND THE GLORY OF THE LORD HAS RISEN UPON ME! ISAIAH 60;1 8
WHAT MAP GOT YOU HERE?
YOUR BEST THINKING IS WHAT GOT YOU HERE. Thinking is how we interact with the world. Thinking directs us to do one thing rather than another. Thinking tells you where to go and where not to go. Thinking tells you what to say and what not to say. Look at your thinking.. That will show you how you respond to your world.
WE TAKE IN INFORMATION WITH.. Our senses Sight Hearing, Touch, Taste, Smell, Intuition (that gut feeling). We process this information and then respond. WE FORGET OR REBEL AND DON T ASK GOD.
You have not been thinking about your thoughts. You have been impulsive. You have been selfish. You have been disconnected from other people. You have been arrogant (My LIFE is my business I don t hurt anyone). Now, as a result, you are suffering negative consequences.
YOU NEED A NEW MAP Look around, you are lost and you don t know why (defense---denial)---not a river in Egypt. A new map is needed to find your way out of the maze of INSANITY. You need to become fully human again.
THOUGHT MAPS Thinking is a tool. You make a mental map of the outside world. What is safe in the outside world? What can I get away with in the outside world? Where are my boundaries? What are the legal boundaries in this situation? Where is it safe? Where is it dangerous?
MENTAL MAP MAKING Men are especially visual. Mental mapmaking happens unconsciously and goes on constantly. You are making mental maps now..
GROUP ACTIVITY. Draw your mental map prior (before) you got HERE TODAY.. Explain to the group your map and how you used it. What were you thinking? What were you feeling? What were your values? What was your core belief? (Core meaning hard center of innermost thoughts, feelings and values.)
SKILLS AND STRATEGIES IN MANAGING AND COPING WITH DEPRESSION. Skill 1: KNOW THE TRIGGERS-past and present. Skill 2: BE AWARE of depressed thoughts and beliefs. :I don t care; I m worthless; What s the use. I don t have a problem. I have strong will power. It is my business, I don t hurt anyone else. Skill 3: CHANGE depressed thoughts and beliefs. Skill 4: TAKE ACTION Take charge of your life. Let GOD Be in control. Work your goals for a Godly life.
STEP METHOD S - situation-leading to guilty feelings. T - thinking change thoughts to ones that are more appropriate to the situation. E - emotion-have thoughts that lead to positive feelings. P - positive action and outcomes.
TOPICS OF DISCUSSION Barriers to admitting stinking thinking. Weighing the Evidence of your behavior. Core Beliefs influence. Perception. How do I stop the cycle? 19
TOPIC ONE: BARRIERS TO YOUR STINKING THINKING. Stinking thinking is circular thinking. You ask a question and give yourself an answer with a question in order to serve your interest. Who says MY CHOICES hurt me? Don t I deserve to have some pleasures in life? Whose business it anyway? 20
THE POWER OF THINKING.. THINKING ERRORS ARE HOW YOU THINK and NOT what you think. Research shows that it is people s thinking or SELF-TALK (what you are continually telling yourself) that ultimately controls YOUR feelings and actions. If you are having relationship problems, then face up to your faulty thinking or self talk. ` If you are having financial problems, then face up to your faulty thinking and self-talk. 21
SELF-TALK INFLUENCES.. 22
BARRIERS TO ADMITTING.. Give three examples of personality traits that block you from admitting your thinking errors. (Pride, false belief in strong will power, attitude of my way or no way, rebellion, anti-social, selffocusing, procrastination, ambivalent). 23
THE EVIDENCE BECOMING AWARE OF YOUR INNER MAPS As a man thinketh in his heart so is he. Proverbs 23:7 We look at the world through our maps. Our maps are formed by our thoughts. We seldom stop to look at our thoughts or at our maps. 24
HOW TO WEIGH THE EVIDENCE. 1. First, you must identify WHAT thinking error is give it a name. 2. Second, you must clearly nail down WHY you think this way and acknowledge the selfdefeating behavior attached. 3. Third, have some idea in mind of what kind of remedy would help improve the situation. 4. Does that make sense? 25
CORE BELIEFS INFLUENCE: THINKING DISTORTIONS Thinking distortions aren t about what you think, but rather how you think. Thinking distortions are Core beliefs, basic assumptions you have made about yourself, others, and the world that may be in conflict with the facts. 26
CORE BELIEFS What is your attitude? What are you for or against? Are you for drugs and alcohol? Are the Laws without meaning? What are the Laws for? Should we be concerned about the safety of others and ourselves? What is your attitude about how your behavior is affecting your partner and children? Would you argue with the medical profession and Court system about your behavior and the affects on your family? 27
CORE BELIEFS ARE LIKE THE LAYERS OF ROCK BENEATH THE SURFACE OF LAND. 28
OPERATION BY SENSES OR FEELINGS IS INVALIDED IT IS PERCEPTION. 29
WE TAKE IN INFORMATION WITH.. Our senses Sight Hearing, Touch, Taste, Smell, Intuition (that gut feeling). We process this information and then respond. WE FORGET TO ASK FOR GOD S INTERPUTATION. 30
WHAT KEEPS THE CYCLE GOING? Losing control over your guilt, FEAR, ANGER by SEARCHING IN THE WORLD FOR THE ANSWER RATHER THAN IN THE WORD. Denying appropriate guilt, FEAR, ANGER. Preventing yourself from seeing right from wrong. LETTING YOUR MORALS COMPRISE.
STEP METHOD S - situation-leading to guilty feelings. T - thinking change thoughts to ones that are more appropriate to the situation. E - emotion-have thoughts that lead to positive feelings. P - positive action and outcomes.
FOR AS HE THINKETH IN HIS HEART SO IS HE PROVERBS 23:7 33