Dealing with Complaints and Difficult Customers [Photo of Presenter] C.W. Miller President, CTC cw@customtrainingconcepts.com www.customtrainingconcepts.com
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Agenda The Life cycle of a failed customer relationship Why difficult customers do what they do Who s really got the monkey (the problem) Emotional Hijacking The Dynamic loop of a complaint How to handle complaints for positive outcomes Q&A
Learning Objectives: After this seminar, participants will be able to 1. recognize and diminish the impact of emotional hijacking. 2. apply a five step process to turn complaints into opportunities. 3. explain why difficult people do what they do and how they push our buttons. 4. avoid the number one most critical mistake in handling complaints.
Four Stages
A good job of presenting ourselves On our best behavior Carefully watch how they react to our efforts Try to make them feel special Adjust as necessary to strengthen the relationship
Everything is wonderful. We celebrate the joy of coming together. We re so thankful to have them. We don t even notice those minor difficulties. They re all ours. (Forever?)
The parties are getting used to each other. They begin to take each other for granted. Failures to meet expectations are noticed. It doesn t feel special any more. Unresolved conflicts cause mistrust and resentment.
Patience has been exhausted. They re no longer willing to tolerate problems. They begin to long for that special feeling. They begin to look elsewhere to regain the magic. Both parties are left wondering what happened.
Customer satisfaction is most often lost as the routine develops. This is when apathy can easily set in for both parties. Your ability to sustain lasting customer relationships depends on what you do during this part of the cycle.
Consider a difficult situation you have encountered. What do customers do that makes them difficult.
Why do they do that? They do it because it works Behavior and actions are a choice The answer what s in it for them
The bigger question is Why are they difficult for us? Separate the people from the behavior. Decide who has the monkey.
Pick a customer What did they do? The behavior? Why did it bother you? The impact?
Would you accept this behavior from some people? Why?
Who s Got the Monkey
Separate person from the behavior Consider only the behavior Is it the person or our own perception
Question Yourself Are you the only one it bothers? Do others bother you the same way? Is the business unaffected?
When the answers are yes You may have the monkey! Sometimes, people just seem to
...push our buttons!
Any event or action that causes a high level of emotion can be called an emotional trigger. When an emotional trigger occurs, we choose our response.
When our response seems to occur instantaneously without conscious thought it is Emotional Hijacking
Event or Action Judgment Feeling Response Perceptions It can all happen in an instant! And Paradigms Perceptions and paradigms reinforce each other!
5 Minutes 50 Years
Arbinger Institute Hearts are at war
Jonathan Haidt Confirmation bias Get along best with those like us Most problems with the oppositional
The key fact is that judgment is not always based on truth. More often it is based on our view of reality according to our subconscious beliefs. Unfortunately, past experience, coupled with established patterns can distort judgment causing feelings and responses that are problematic.
Feeling Concern Choose a Response Expressed as Complaint Impacts our Feelings
Feeling Concern Escalate Choose a Response Expressed as Complaint De- escalate Impacts our Feelings
One of 3 Ways Destroyed Sustained Improved
To a great extent, the nature of the exchange, and ultimately the direction the relationship takes, depends on our response.
This goes for both external and internal customers. When we get negative feedback; it doesn t make us or our performance bad.
You do not need to affirm their rightness, but you do need to affirm their importance and the importance of your relationship.
What do they want? To be acknowledged! Don t take it personally. It s not about you. It s really about them.
anything that people hear from us that sounds like an analysis or a criticism, or that implies wrongness on their part prevents us from connecting with them These verbal miscues are what I call pushes.
Be sure your head is in the right place. Look at complaints as opportunities.
5 Step Shift 1) Acknowledge 2) Apologize (without blame) 3) Shift (To Positive) 4) Distinguish ourselves (Why we are special) 5) Resolve (Negotiate Solutions)
C.W. Miller info@customtrainingconcepts.com www.customtrainingconcepts.com