MODULE #7 ANXIETY AND FEAR ANXIETY 1. ORIGIN A. Anxiety was experienced In the Garden of Eden (Genesis 3) Where I Am Supposed To Be (My own or other s expectations) Real or Perceived B - HIGH ANXIETY My level of anxiety is proportional to the difference and distance between A & B Where I Am A - LOW ANXIETY B. As a result of the sin of disobeying God by eating from the TREE of the knowledge of good and evil, Adam and Eve were guilty of felt ashamed, which caused them GREAT anxiety. 2. CAUSES OF ANXIETY A. Anxiety comes when we are TRYING to be what we are not capable of being, or when we are trying to meet a NEED that we are not qualified to MEET. B. Indecisiveness: when we are trying to DECIDE but have mixed feelings (I want to but I don t want to). C. Fear of discovery: We will be EXPOSED for what we really are, and because of that PEOPLE will reject us. D. Basic insecurity of fear: The root of all depression, anxiety, and guilt is FEAR. Guilt is just a way for us to FEEL that we are in CONTROL, almost like we think we are actually doing something about the situation. E. Boredom: anxiety gives us something to do when there is nothing else to do. WORRYING about a situation also makes us FEEL we are doing something about it. 1
F. God s law becomes a place for anxiety because we know that apart from God s HELP, we cannot keep it. 3. LEVELS OF ANXIETY A. Anxiety 1 The FOUNDATION of the PERSON is established in the formative years of 0-6 years old. 1. Generally takes place in childhood or even in the WOMB. 2. Early trauma leaves the CHILD helpless, with no opportunity to resolve or grieve LOSSES. B. Anxiety 2 CIRCUMSTANCES seem BIGGER than they really are because new stresses compound and build on top of the anxiety already within. 1. Can begin anytime AFTER the foundational anxiety has occurred. This secondary anxiety can develop even as a toddler. 2. Can be caused by stressful and difficult living situations, relationships, CONFLICT, lack of support, etc. Anything that makes us FEEL powerless or inadequate. C. Anxiety 3 The fear of dealing with everyday life circumstances. Anxiety 3 produces ANXIETY disorders. 1. All OTHER anxieties are expressed as phobias, addictions, etc. 2. Can only be HELPED by first addressing and resolving Anxiety 1 and 2. 4. HOW TO GET RID OF ANXIETY OR DIFFUSE ANXIETY A. Labeling just knowing the source of our anxiety helps us FEEL less powerless. 2
FEAR 1. Naming a problem. 2. Naming a feeling. B. Understanding the CAUSE and LEARNING how to let GOD deal with the root. 1. Insights 2. Discernment 3. Wisdom C. Agape love Perfect love casts out fear. 1 John 4:18. 1. As we see and accept how God LOVES us UNCONDITIONALLY, no matter what we have done, it will cause us to feel SECURE. 2. Knowing that the all-powerful God loves and cares for me makes my FEARS look small and powerless. 1. FEAR OF GOD A. Fear is a FEELING of powerlessness in the face of someone or something more powerful than us. B. All fear is based on: 1. You can TAKE AWAY something that I NEED to survive. 2. You HAVE SOMETHING I need and you may withhold it. 3
C. Children believe their parents have this POWER. 2. ORIGINS 1. As we mature we come to know ONLY GOD ultimately has this power, and that our PARENTS are not gods. When I was a child, I talked like a child, I thought like a child, I reasoned like a child. When I became a man, I put childish ways behind me. I Corinthians 13:11. 2. The emotionally mature person understands that God will never LEAVE them nor FORSAKE them. Can a mother forget the baby at her breast and have no compassion on the child she has borne? Though she may forget, I will not forget you! See, I have engraved you on the palms of my hands; your walls are ever before me. Isaiah 49:15, 16. 3. The only one we need to FEAR is God, and He has promised to be gracious to us. We are SAFE to feel powerless in HIS presence. There is no fear in love. But perfect love drives our fear I John 4:18 A. Innate fears (Fears we were born with): 1. Fear of falling. 2. Fear of loud noises. B. Learned fear: 1. Unmet NEEDS (fear of death, hunger, lack of shelter, pain, etc.) 4
2. Basic insecurity (conditional LOVE) 3. Modeled fears we pick up the FEARS of those around us. 3. RESPONSES TO FEAR: A. Fight B. Freeze C. Flight 4. FEAR EXISTS BENEATH: A. Anxiety: Comes when we are trying to be what we are not capable of being, or when we are trying to meet a need that we are not qualified to meet. B. Anger: However, there is justifiable anger caused by being rejected, abandoned, used, ignored, scorned, criticized, and not wanted. Emotional pain causes anger. C. Guilt: Is a result of sin. Existential guilt results when you know you have broken God s commands, or ethically. Neurotic guilt is when one feels that he or she is bad just a bad person D. Phobias: A PHOBIA is an abnormal fear of an object that in itself is harmless, but in the mind of an individual it is threatening to his security and, therefore, causes fear. It may be a neurotic fear of heights, a fear of being under water, riding in an elevator, spiders, leaving the safety of the home or even the fear of peanut butter sticking to the roof of your mouth. There are many kinds of phobias but beneath all of them is an extreme or irrational fear or aversion to something that would not normally be something that would affect us so deeply. (Read Facing Unresolved Conflicts, page 62-63). 5
5. FEAR IS DIFFUSED BY: A. LOOKING at it and separating the feeling from FACT and the fantasy from reality. 6. AMBIVALENCE (CONFLICTING EMOTIONS) A. A child cannot understand these conflicting EMOTIONS. They see things as all good or all bad not both good and BAD. B. A child tries to REMEDY conflicting emotions in the parent. 1. Contempt for self (because parents are all good, I must be BAD if they say I am bad). 2. Contempt for others (they HURT or frightened me so they must be all bad). C. The results RESOVLING conflicting emotions: 1. Creates dependency on GOD because we know that He is ultimately in charge. 2. Works humility into us because we have to FACE our brokenness. 3. Builds up self and one s relationship with God because we are not so confused. He is a double-minded man, unstable in all he does. James 1:8 D. The refusal to deal with conflicting emotions causes us to LIVE in constant fear and sets us up for: 1. IDOLATRY when we have to look to others to MAKE decisions for us or to tell us who we are. 6
2. HATRED we hate either ourselves, or the other PERSON. 3. BITTERNESS if we do not deal with our ANGER, it will create a root of bitterness. 4. RESENTMENT we do not want to be around anyone or anything that reminds us of the PAIN we have, so we make no effort to resolve our CONFLICTS. If your brother sins against you, go and show him his fault, just between the two of you. If he listens to you, you have won your brother over. Matthew 18:15. Get rid of all bitterness, rage and anger, brawling and slander, along with every form of malice. Be kind and compassionate to one another, forgiving each other, just as in Christ God forgave you. Ephesians 4:31, 32. 7
Name: Lesson Number:(7)Anxiety and Fear Date: STUDY QUESTIONS: 1. What is the relationship between Anxiety 1, 2, and 3? 2. What are some causes of anxiety in your life? 3. What does it mean to FEAR? 4. Why is it good to FEAR GOD? 8
5. What are three possible responses to fear? 6. How is fear overcome? 7. Of what, or whom are you most afraid? 8. How can the FEAR OF GOD help to overcome anger, guilt, and fear? 9. I get anxious when 9
10. My greatest fear is COMMENTS OR CONCERNS: RESPONSE TO COMMENTS OF CONCERNS: Upon completion of these study questions please mail them to: Marcus Odom, GLF-President RMSI / 387496 / 6B-109 Nashville, Tennessee 37209 10