Harmony in the home with Challenging Children. By Laura Kerbey Positive Autism Support and Training

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1 Harmony in the home with Challenging Children By Laura Kerbey Positive Autism Support and Training

2 Helping to put problems with autism in the PAST. Behaviour Coaching Coffee mornings with other parents who have children with autism and other special needs Babysitting Family Mentoring Advice on the statement process / DLA etc Accredited and non Accredited Training Support and advice for schools

3 What is Autism? Sensory Difficulties. Iceberg Theory of Behaviour. Motivation and Organisation. Social Skills and Communication. Question...

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5 1% of the population. 433,000 adults and 107,000 children in the UK. The cost of autism: 28 billion per annum Lifetime cost of autism: 4.7 million per person.

6 Is not A result of parent rejection A result of an emotional disorder A mental illness Genius very few have greater skills most do not. Curable

7 Is A developmental condition Diagnosed by a paediatrician More common in boys than girls (Approx 75% males) A life long disability Neurological and genetic.

8 Severe language problems some may never develop spoken language. Significant learning difficulties. No desire to socialise. No significant language delay or problems with structure. Higher order and social use of language are affected. Learning difficulties are less severe however, may have a different learning style. Has a desire to socialise and make friends. Autism Aspergers Syndrome

9 DSM 5 This is now the DYAD of impairment as social / emotional and Communication and Language are now combined.

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11 The autistic student may be over or under sensitive in the following areas: Sight Smell Touch Taste Hearing TASK - Consider how sensory difficulties will impact on a child with autism in a range of settings.

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13 Restricted vocabulary Attention and shared attention difficulties Inappropriate eye-contact Echolalia repeating words but not responding to their meaning Pro-noun reversal Use of odd intonation Inappropriate communication to social context Literalism Poor auditory skills Sequencing difficulties

14 Pull your socks up Has the cat got your tongue? Keep your eye on the ball You can say that again! You re pulling my leg!

15 Understanding that apparent lack of understanding or attention is probably not deliberate Use child s name at the beginning of an instruction Simplify language and reduce sentence size Be ready to repeat instructions without re-wording Provide visual clues write down key points. Use lists. Give time for response and check understanding. If giving a sequence of instructions, give them one at a time do not move on until each step is complete Try to avoid sarcasm If using humour smile!! Do not try dead pan! Do not say, Would you like to? Use choices, Would you like to start with your Maths or English Homework?

16 A lack of attention to people Treating people as inanimate objects Not responding when addressed as a group Needing personal space but not understanding that others have personal space Little comprehension of emotions Inability to play or socialise interactively with other children Misunderstanding of social and formal rules formal are better than social as they are less complicated.

17 Can make offensive comments Expects other people to know their thoughts and feelings Response to peer pressure can range from indifference to total over reaction Expressions of emotion often inappropriately extreme Unlikely to understand the concept of fashion. WHAT IS THE LONG TERM IMPACT OF THE ABOVE? DISCUSS..

18 Inability to see someone else's point of view. Central coherence seeing the individual tree and not the whole of the forest i.e. Can memorise car registrations but has a significant learning difficulty. Difficulty with generalisation i.e. Very specific detail. Difficulty with some problem solving likes very specific answers. Difficulty in creating something entirely from imagination. Rigidity difficulties in change of routine.

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20 Muscle tension Fatigue Restlessness Difficulty sleeping Irritability Edginess Aggression Running away Symptoms Sensory difficulties Relationships Social / Communication diffs School Home circumstances Breaks in routine New situations and environments. Causes

21 Be careful what you say. Be a positive role model. Identify and redirect inaccurate beliefs. Be spontaneous and affectionate. Give positive, accurate feedback. Create a safe, loving home environment. Help kids become involved in constructive experiences.

22 Task Map your child on to an iceberg.

23 Challenging behaviour associated with Autistic Spectrum Conditions: Argumentative Rude and offensive Manipulative Refusal to do work particularly written work! Refusal to participate in group work Aggressive - sometimes violent Destructive

24 Loud Difficult to motivate Difficult to sit still stay on task Refusal to change task / activity Self injurious behaviour Self harming behaviour Obsessive, repetitive behaviour

25 Although these kinds of behaviours can be extremely challenging, it is really important to try and keep as calm as possible so that a child who is displaying challenging behaviour does not feed off your reaction. It is also important to be consistent in your approach and for the other adults around to use the same consistent approach, so that your child does not get mixed messages and are really clear about what is expected of them.

26 By reducing language, young people with autism are less likely to feel overloaded by information and more likely to be able to process what you say. If you have to repeat what you are saying, use the same words to avoid confusion. Children with ASC are often strong visual learners and can have difficulties with short-term memory. It can be very effective to back up what you are saying with visual supports, which consolidate what you say and help your child really understand the information they are being given. Avoid sarcasm and idioms which will confuse and cause more frustration.

27 Using rewards and motivators can really help to persuade children to complete a task that they do not want to do, or to encourage a particular behaviour. Even if the behaviour or task is very short, if it is followed by praise and a reward, a child will learn what is acceptable. If undesirable behaviour is met with a lack of attention and redirection, it is likely to stop. 123 Magic Approach!

28 It can be helpful to build in opportunities for children and young people to relax each day. Children also benefit from having a safe haven where they can go to chill out. Challenging behaviour can often be diffused by an activity that releases energy or pent-up anger or anxiety. Trampolines, punch bags, climbing etc are all great way to burn off energy!

29 Pay attention to the kind of behaviour you want to continue. Ignore any behaviours which are not destructive, dangerous or harmful to others. Be consistent no matter what! (Major earthquakes or similar events might be a reason not to be consistent.) Let your children know what your behavioural expectations are and be sure that they understand them. Be careful about what you promise or threaten because you have to carry through even if it punishes you. If the child doesn t respond to your instructions after the second time you have talked to them, get up and move toward them. Most of the time, you will quickly get the expected response. Avoid sarcasm, negativity. Be neutral emotionally when dealing with inappropriate behaviour. If you get upset and angry, you are no longer in control.

30 Don t ask why did you do that, you will probably get a shrug and I don t know. Instead ask, what do you think you should have done or how could you do that better?. Separate the behaviour from the child. I like you, but not the way you behave. Be fair, yet firm. Reward and remark about good behaviour frequently. I like the way you are sitting quietly and working so hard. Be a good model. They will do what you do a lot faster than what you tell them to do. If you have to reprimand a child about anything, it is important to use the next possible time to give them some kind of positive reinforcement. Respond immediately to behaviours whether they are good or bad. Whenever possible, give children choices. You choose two things which are appropriate and let them decide between them. Your children should know and understand consequences for good or inappropriate behaviour.

31 Scales can be used to help children understand their emotions better. It allows you to make suggestions to help. Other people in the family can also understand the child s emotions.

32 Stay calm and don t panic. Lower your voice - never raise it. Do not argue back. Explain that you understand that the child is angry, upset etc. Explain calmly that the child s behaviour is unacceptable or inappropriate but it is the behaviour you have an issue with NOT them. Do not take things personally and DO NOT GET PERSONAL BACK! If other children are in danger remove them. If you feel that you are losing control and it is safe to do so leave! Remember that a child who has been in crisis is like a recently boiled kettle it will not take much for them to get to boiling point again. Allow them to fully calm down before you try to talk about the incident, apply sanctions etc. In some circumstances this can take a day or more.

33 Think about a time that your child had a meltdown or crisis. Using the iceberg theory re-consider the causes of the incident. What would you do now to prevent this happening again? What would you do differently if your child has a meltdown in the future.

34 Remember that all children with autism are unique. What works with one may not work with another. And what works one day may not work the next.

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