Leaning In, Standing Back, and Encouraging Forward: Closing the Confidence Gap for your Students, Employees, and Selves

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Leaning In, Standing Back, and Encouraging Forward: Closing the Confidence Gap for your Students, Employees, and Selves

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Presenter Information Ariel Tarosky Director of Education & Communication at Triangle Fraternity In the beginning stages of her confidence journey Cat Sohor Director of Fraternal Development at Delta Chi Fraternity Considers herself to be a confident woman

About The Program All started with a book: The Nice Girl Syndrome: Stop Being Manipulated and Abused- and Start Standing Up For Yourself Lead to the conscious traveling of my confidence journey Prominence in Hollywood, politics & our field Focus on the practical application

Program Takeaways Self-confidence & self-efficacy Individual Students Supervisees 1. Identify four ways to increase assertiveness in your personal life 2. Identify three opportunities to increase confidence and self-empowerment in female students 3. Determine effective methods for supervising female staff members

Program Framework Albert Bandura s Social Cognitive theory Behaviors Environment Personal/cognitive factors Self-efficacy is developed from mastery experiences Different concept than self-esteem but related Greater perception of self-efficacy experienced, more likely to approach difficult tasks, challenges & opportunities (Bandura, A. 1993.).

Individual Lens: Theory Low self-confidence can be a result of: How you were raised Past/present abusive relationships How you view your body Society Perceived low self-efficacy or self-confidence affects how you approach personal and professional situations (Gilligan, C. 2003).

Individual Lens: Practice Confidence vs. cockiness Stop apologizing for everything Identify your needs and wants and ask them to be satisfied Acknowledge that people are responsible for their own behavior Express negative thoughts and feelings in a healthy & positive manner Receive criticism & compliments positively Learn to say no Focus on ways to actively build your self-esteem Lean in and help others

Advising Lens: Theory Socialization of leadership needs to start at a young age 86% of women taught to be nice 34% of women encouraged to share their point of view Factors affecting confidence Risk taking Failure Perseverance Eliminate gender-based assumptions (KPMG, 2014).

Advising Lens: Practice Devote equal time to men s and women s groups Effectively utilize your time spent with female students Examine the culture on campus for women Examine the sorority traditions that currently exist Serve as a role model

Advising Through Recruitment Women struggle in situation's where they feel the pressure to be perfect on a regular basis but are also persuaded to be better and strive for more (Pasucci, 2013). Entering into a situation where you compare yourself to others, especially when vulnerability is at play can damage self-esteem How can sorority recruitment be a tool to help build confidence in women?

Supervising Lens: Theory After two years on the job, only 44% of female employees say their supervisor is supportive of their career aspirations (Bain, 2006). Survey of more than 3,000 women aged 18-64, six in 10 working women indicated they aspire to be a senior leader or sit on a board, but that they do not have the confidence to apply (KPMG, 2014). Women are less likely to take a risk on their career and over time miss out on opportunities (Beck, 2016).

Supervising Lens: Practice Examine the workplace environment Can a woman be assertive? Do women feel apart of the team? What are your policies and procedures? Do you promote collaboration? Are you trying to make her one of the guys? Be conscious of your language and terminology Don t refer to her as a great "female" employee Does she apologize often for no reason? Does she dance around topics?

"These cartoons hilariously describe the double standards women face at work every day" - Emily Baines

Supervising Lens: Practice Consider your assumptions If she is confident do you assume she is being aggressive? If she is quiet, do you assume that she is weak? Providing feedback How do you provide your female employees with feedback? Are you recognizing her for her work? How do you approach mediating conflict between your staff members? Managing Emotions As a supervisor it is important to be able to help manage emotions of all of your employees

Supervising Lens: Practice Compensation Women make less money than their male counterparts- are you compensating appropriately? Women are less likely to ask for a raise or promotion so how to you encourage your women to advance within the organization (if that is something she wants)? Competition Are you a strong woman supervising another strong woman? Think about how you can work together instead of against one another.

Lean in, Stand Back and Encourage z Forward Be proud of your confidence Keep the conversation going Surround yourself with confident women Support other women Stop apologizing Learn to say no Express negative thoughts in a healthy & positive manner Be conscious of the women in your life Be careful of the assumptions you make based off of your own gender bias

Questions & Answers

Thank you for Participating