NESC January 18, 2016 Top 20 Training Tom Cody. Above and Below the Line: How Our Thinking Governs Our Experience

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1 NESC January 18, 2016 Top 20 Training Tom Cody Above and Below the Line: How Our Thinking Governs Our Experience Above the Line A positive view on life and Positive attitudes and beliefs how we see the world Hopeful and optimistic Energetic moods and emotions Power to control my life Focused on what is important Below the Line A negative view on life and how we see the world Depressing moods and emotions Lose focus on what is important Negative attitudes and beliefs Hopeless and pessimistic Powerless victim of life 1. Living or Visiting 2. Life Looks Different from Above or Below the Line 3. Making Decisions Below the Line à Mess 4. Conditions Do Not Determine Experience: Keep Your Day 5. Invitations: conditions/situations that invite us to go BTL. 6. Indicators: feelings we have or behaviors we manifest when BTL. 7. Submarine: maintaining dignity during our BTL visits. 8. Trampolines: means by which we can think straight and bounce back ATL. 9. Outside/Inside: Bottom 80s wait for outside conditions to improve then the inside experience gets better. Top 20s improve the inside first then the outside condition gets better. 10. Teacher Tips: A. Avoid using the work attitude. B. Put your picture on the Line poster. C. Have an Invitation prop available at all times. D. Teach this concept early in the semester and with passion. E. Refer to the Line daily.

2 LISTENING LEVELS The Zone: Being present in the moment; listening to understand; not thinking. Processing: Thinking about what is being said; analyzing. Distracted: Focusing on something in the environment. Judgmental: Agreeing or disagreeing; evaluating self or others. My Life is on My Mind: Being focused on your own life and what matters to you. Getting to the Zone: 1. Be AWARE: Know when you are not in the Zone. 2. Say Not now 3. Use the Parking Lot 4. Focus on the NOW: Pay attention to whatever is happening in the moment.

3 THE FRAME: What We See Is What We Get The Frame: How we SEE something influences how we FEEL. How we FEEL influences what we DO. What we DO influences what we GET. What we GET reinforces how we SEE. 1. When what we are feeling is real, we think that what we are seeing is. 2. When not getting what we want to be getting: Bottom 80s: Top 20s: 1. Change nothing. Get Curious: Change how we see it. 2. Change what we do. 3. Blame: Gets activated by our need to be right. 3. How do we operate when we are: Curious 4. Three Types of s: Bottom 80: R = R When I think I am right, I am RIGHT. à Top 20: R = W When I think I am right, I am WRONG. I just don t know what I m wrong about YET. à Top 20: à R = R When I think I am right, I am RIGHT (correct) but not complete. There is more that I don t see.

4 5. Four Ways to See More or Differently: A. Create a crisis. B. Ask someone else how he/she sees it. C. Change roles. D. Say Maybe. 6. Two Paths: Top 20 Bottom 80 We are blind. We know it. We are curious. We are responsible. We maintain our power. We make a difference. We are blind. We don t know it. We blame. We are victim. We give up power. We are stuck in yuck. 7. What s a situation in which I am not getting what I want to be getting? A. How do I see it? B. What do I feel? Do I have a need to be right? C. What am I doing? Am I blaming? D. What am I getting? Re-Frame: How might I see this differently?

5 KAIZEN: Continual Improvement Action Plan: Continue: Start: Stop: TOP 20 TRAINING S MISSION To empower people to reach their true potential by providing light- hearted, life- changing seminars and materials that create sudden and substantial growth in emotional intelligence. TRAINING and EDUCATIONAL MATERIALS Training: Sessions are scheduled to meet the particular needs of a school or district. Specific training is available for: Educators Creating a Culture of Learning and Engaging Disengaged Students Students Kaizen Retreat (Grades 5-8; 2 hours; topics include listening in the zone, helping others succeed, eliminating negativity, celebrating confusion and making things better after messing up) Dare to Lead (Grades 7-12; 2 hours; topics include being your true self, making and learning from mistakes and challenging negativity) Removing Negativity from Tween/Teen Girl Culture: Eliminate Gossip, Rumors and Mean Girl Behavior (1 1 2 hours) Coaches Developing Potential in Athletes and Teams Parents Guiding Our Children Through Life s Challenges Training ranges from one hour to three days including keynote presentations and professional development sessions for individual schools or entire districts. 1 Day, 2 Days or Half- day Trainings include a combination of the following topics: Living Above the Line: How Our Thinking Governs Our Knowing How to See Things Differently: The Frame Tending to the Inner Life of Students: Helping Students Get from Fear to Confidence Helping Students Learn from Mistakes and Move Outside Their Comfort Creating Safe Connections in the Classroom That Foster Student Engagement Keeping Stupid in the Box: Eliminating Student Roadblocks for Success Pricing varies according to time and group size. They have co- authored Top 20 Teachers: The Revolution in American Education, Top 20 Parents: Raising Happy, Responsible and Emotionally Healthy Children and Top 20 Teens: Discovering the Best- kept Thinking, Learning and Communicating Secrets of Successful Teenagers. To order Top 20 Training products or for more information, contact Top 20 Training at: info@top20training.com Tom Cody #