Get a Grip: How to Excel at Solving Workplace Conflict by Harnessing Your Emotional Intelligence

Transcription

1 Get a Grip: How to Excel at Solving Workplace Conflict by Harnessing Your Emotional Intelligence Melissa Merres, MA Associate Certified Coach, International Coaching Federation Melissa Merres Coaching

2 None

3 Recognize importance of communication styles Understand common approaches to style differences Gain familiarity with the communication styles diagnostic

4 Presentation Overview What matters about communication styles? Communication breakdowns cause conflict Assuming sameness Appreciating differences Common approaches to style differences Basic communication styles Male/Female styles Information processing styles Communication Styles Diagnostic (Shapiro, 1999) Connector Seeker Planner Driver

5 Presentation Overview What matters about communication styles? Communication breakdowns cause conflict Assuming sameness Appreciating differences Common approaches to style differences Basic communication styles Male/Female styles Information processing styles Communication Styles Diagnostic (Shapiro, 20XX) Connector Seeker Planner Driver

6 What s important about communication styles?

7 A moment of (uncomfortable) silence

8 Know Yourself What conversational behavior or way of speaking do you find extremely offputting?

9 Communication styles are a model for understanding differences in how we think and speak We operate under our own rules. We assume everyone follows the same rules. We expect sameness and interpret based on the assumption of sameness. (Shapiro, 1999)

10 Presentation Overview What matters about communication styles? Communication breakdowns cause conflict Assuming sameness Appreciating differences Common approaches to style differences Basic communication styles Male/Female styles Information processing styles Communication Styles Diagnostic (Mary Shapiro, 1999) Connector Seeker Planner Driver

11 Common understanding of communication styles

12 Male and Female Speech Patterns (Tannen, 2007)

13 Information processing styles: External A + B + C + D = E A + B + C + D = E

14 Information processing styles: Internal A + B + C + D = E!

15 Presentation Overview What matters about communication styles? Communication breakdowns cause conflict Assuming sameness Appreciating differences Common approaches to style differences Basic communication styles Male/Female styles Information processing styles Communication Styles Diagnostic (Shapiro, 1999) Connector Seeker Planner Driver

16 Communication Styles Diagnostic (Shapiro, 1999)

17 Communication Styles Diagnostic People focus: trustworthiness by familiarity emphasis on relationship preference for spontaneity Intuitive Task focus: trustworthiness by track record emphasis on tasks preference for structure fact-based Goal: produce good outcomes with people Goal: produce good outcomes independently (Shapiro, 1999)

18 Communication Styles Diagnostic Present orientation: Preference for familiar Peace and calm Approach change carefully Future orientation: Influence decisions, tasks, and people Willingness to challenge Preference for change and risk Comfort with moving quickly Goal: optimize present to prepare for future Goal: finish present tasks to get to what s next (future) (Shapiro, 1999)

19 Communication Styles Diagnostic Categories Connector: People, Present Seeker: People, Future Planner: Task, Present Driver: Task, Future (Shapiro, 1999)

20 Inquiries for future application What does good work look like to these different kinds of communicators? How do these different kinds of communicators want you to interact with them? How do these different kinds of communicators approach decision making? With this knowledge, how will you go about working with a team?

21 Thank you! Melissa Merres, MA Associate Certified Coach, International Coaching Federation Melissa Merres Coaching