SESSION TWO (2 of 8) One hour to one and a half hours

Transcription

1 SESSION TWO (2 of 8) Objectives for this session: Identify that gender identities are socially constructed and culturally policed Understand that individuals can often be mistaken about others beliefs and values Recognise links between sexist attitudes, discriminatory practices and gender based violence There are three essential points that facilitators need to keep in mind for the duration of this session, which covers lad culture and introduces male violence against women. These points will be covered in later sessions and are: Overwhelmingly, men are the perpetrators of sexual and domestic violence against both female and male victims; The aetiology as well as the impact and harm of abusive behaviour are gendered impact is experienced differently by victims This programme is specifically a programme to address sexual coercion and domestic abuse it is not a general programme aimed at general antisocial behaviour. Therefore we must address problematic aspects of masculinity, sensitively. Session plan ONE HOUR to one and a half hours Time One hour to one and a half hours What you need to know as Ensure that volume is high for playing embedded video clips. Make sure you leave 5-10 mins to spend on the empathy exercise and have the instructions with you. Powerpoint slides, Internet connection to play clips (including logging on to BoB National if using to play TV clips) White board / flipchart / pens. Handout: pyramid of sexual violence. Handouts: printed handout notes to accompany presentation if using Instructions for Empathy Exercise & spare paper/pens for students if they are unlikely to have paper and pens with them 1/16

2 2 mins Brief recap What we have covered in last session: bystanders, the psychology of bystanders, why domestic violence and sexual violence is everybody s problem. Ground rules. Slides 1, 2 & 3 Handout printed presentation notes pages if using 1 min Understanding social norms The first thing that we need to know is that most of us exhibit healthy and positive attitudes and behaviours around sex and relationships, most of the time. On this slide this is represented by the big green person and these people represent the majority. Unfortunately there are some people the little red people whose behaviour is often completely unacceptable and has bad consequences. For example, a rapist. Most of these people will have views and attitudes that are negative towards women as well as behaviour that is unacceptable. The next 7 slides are designed for visual impact rather than close scrutiny or debate. We will return to them later. Move through them quickly (a minute or so per slide). Slide: Where we are 2/16

3 1 min False consensus 1 min (longer if time) Positivity 1 min Range of behaviours We heard about false consensus in the last session. This slide is a representation of how the world might look from the position of a red person, a person who has problematic attitudes and behaviours they are likely to believe that their behaviour is normal, majority behaviour - if nobody calls them on it and if is reinforced by cultural messages. Some might not care that their behaviour causes harm to others, but some might not even realise. This slide shows the essence of what can be achieved when we actively set about changing harmful social norms. We need to arrive at a position where healthy, positive behaviour is recognised by everybody, including the red people, as the right behaviour. This is how successful public health campaigns work think about drink driving for example and how socially unacceptable it is now. If there is time, ask the group what they would do if someone they were with tried to drive a car while drunk. Reflect on how this differs from social norms 30 years ago or in other countries or with other kinds of antisocial behaviour. This slide shows a range of behaviours, from healthy and normal to violent and abusive. The arrow is two-sided because behaviours can move in either direction. It is possible to recognise and stop harassment before it becomes sexual assault. And if somebody is being a harasser but they stop when asked, their behaviour can become appropriate. [credit to Joan Tabachnick s Making A Difference NSRVC publication] Slide: false consensus Slide: where we need to get to Slide: range of behaviours 3/16

4 5 secs How do we help to change behaviour So, the question is, how can we help to alter behaviour? Slide: how can we help alter behaviour? 20 secs Behaviour change If we constantly reinforce messages about behaviour that is unacceptable, this puts considerable pressure on people to rethink their behaviour. (facilitators may want to ask for or give examples here) Slide: examples of green people intervening 10 secs We are going to move on now and look at what is going on in student populations at the moment. Here s an example of a personal experience from a recent report by the National Union of Students. - 4/16

5 2 mins Empathy How would you feel if you were that woman? 1 min Gender inequality / difference (Looking for: Scared? Embarrassed? Degraded? Humiliated? Angry? Upset? Powerless? Key point: frightened of escalation see next column) If someone says they would be flattered this can lead to a conversation about how responding positively could validate the behaviour next time, the next person subjected to this could be terrified. And it is a criminal offence (sexual assault) to touch somebody in this way. How do you think these men saw that woman? (Looking for: raise if not raised by the group: she doesn t count she s lesser their enjoyment or bonding is at her expense degrading dehumanising objectified she s not a real person) Frightened of escalation e.g. escalation into gang rape. It is worth pointing this out as often this consideration is not thought about by people who haven t been in that kind of situation it is not an unrealistic fear and it is one less likely to be felt by a male student in a similar situation if confronted by a group of female students. Here, we are touching upon gender inequality the behaviour of this group of men towards this woman is really only understandable in a cultural context where women are viewed as socially inferior or second class but this a difficult message to hear. Gauge your group s interest and resistance, remembering that the main aim of this programme is to develop bystander intervention action through fostering motivation not resistance. Slide: A student s personal experience. (stay on same slide) 5/16

6 1 min Empathy What might the consequences be for that woman? (Looking for: raise if not raised by the group: - traumatised, - afraid of men in groups, - afraid of men generally. - lack of trust in men, - fear of going out. - she is a human being with feelings: not a doll, not an inanimate object!) 1 min Empathy Why do we think that the group of male students behaved in this way? Were they thinking about the female student as a person? If not, why not? Would they be fine with someone behaving in the same way to a woman they care about? Perhaps they didn t empathise in a way that stopped them from behaving like this, because they may not have realised the impact that their behaviour was having. It is really important for everyone to understand what the impact is of behaviour like this, because we want everyone to understand why an intervention in a situation like this can prevent so much harm. 1 min Empathy These are some accounts from students own experiences in response to recent surveys. Are you surprised by them or not? (stay on same slide) Do you empathise slide Impact slide 6/16

7 5 mins Empathy exercise We re going to do something interactive now, to get everyone thinking and contributing to discussion. Follow the instructions in the Victim Empathy Exercise facilitator note I min Culture Now, let s look again at the incident from the Hidden Marks Report. Going back to what we were learning about in terms of social influence, is there anything you notice about the incident and how it happened? (If you have time, discuss and draw out anything the group notices about the incident but you may need to take a more directive approach depending on time) Looking for: - A group of male students (not an individual) - All shouting sexual things at me - One of them takes it further 30 secs Keep these three points in the back of your minds while we are looking at the next few slides. Make sure you have left time for this exercise it is very powerful. We are using this as a way of introducing the concept of problematic male student behaviour in universities, sometimes described as lad culture. Facilitator note Victim Empathy Exercise (one copy for facilitator only) Materials 1 sheet of paper and a pen per participant (bin required afterwards for torn paper) Personal experience slide (again) A group of students slide 7/16

8 2 mins Lad culture Lad culture in universities has been in the news a lot recently and the example of sexual assault we have just been thinking about might be thought about as an extreme example of lad culture at work we are going to have a look at what lad culture might be. Please try to be as positive as possible recognise that this is a critical point where some men may disengage if they feel that men are under attack in any way. Problematic masculinities are fundamental to the prevention of sexual and domestic violence so they must be addressed but not at the expense of engagement. Most men will be horrified by the more extreme examples of lad culture. Slides Lad Culture slide 1, slide 2 1 min Exploring social identity Lad culture is group behaviour. In other words, this kind of behaviour is almost always performed in the company of others who are members of what social psychologists call the in-group. Other kinds of ingroups include supporters of a particular football team, members of a university faculty or a social club (here, try to reference a social club or society in your institution that has male and female members and a strong social identity). Our social identity is very important to us and social norms are very powerful. The aim is to make it clear that we all have a number of identities (eg son, brother, male, Asian, Arsenal supporter, law student, piano player, lad) and not all of our identities are at play all the time. Being a lad is not a fixed identity and the spectrum of laddish behaviour encompasses a range of behaviours not all of which are by any means are problematic). 8/16

9 1 min Being a lad is not something that every man would identify with. For some men it s a hat they might wear only on an occasional night out with certain friends, and for others they might build their friendship groups around the identity of being a lad. Most lads probably don t behave laddishly in front of their grannies. And what has given lad culture a particularly bad name is the subset of laddish behaviours that are perceived as threatening, aggressive or disrespectful of women. The aim is to emphasise that there are plenty of positive aspects to masculinity. The Good Lad Clip explains this from the point of view of a student. Being a Lad slide and clip (1:44 to 2:05 from the Good Lad video) 30 sec positivity This visual aid is a reminder again that most male group behaviour (lad) is absolutely fine. It is important that we continue to reinforce this point so as not to alienate or disengage men in the group the aim is not to cause defensiveness in this group. Members of the group may raise the issue that there are problems with the ways young women behave in groups too when they go out drinking for example, & this is true, but our focus for this programme is specifically sexual coercion & domestic abuse which are related to problematic behaviour that is commonly associated with lad culture. Slide: green and red 9/16

10 3 mins Let s watch this clip. Ask them what is the point being made here? (Looking for: majority of behaviour could be described as harmless fun but some things are inappropriate. The message is sent by an intervention (not laughing) that rape is not a joke. In short, women might be violent but they are not commonly sexually violent or abusive and if they are, the effects are different relate back to the example of the fear of rape experienced by a young woman when groped. Remember the two fundamental differences men are overwhelmingly perpetrators & when women are perpetrators of low level abuse the impact is experienced differently by victims. Make sure that you have the volume turned up enough so that the audience can hear the dialogue at the end of this clip Slide: We are Man clip 5 mins Attitude/ behaviour links Some of you will definitely be thinking now, But a bit of banter never hurt anyone, making a rape joke doesn t mean I am a rapist. Let s have a look at why we can t ignore low level sexist humour. Something that is harmless as far as you are concerned may be more likely than you think to affect people s behaviour in other situations. This clip is from a documentary made by Kirsty Wark in 2013 and called Blurred Lines after the Robin Thicke song containing what are widely regarded as rapey lyrics. Slide: But what s the problem? Play the Blurred Lines clip 10/16

11 1 min Social influence 2 mins (10 if time) Attitudes and beliefs Let s go back to our example of the student sexual harassment experience. In that example, a group of lads were all shouting sexual things at the woman student. In itself, this behaviour is wrong and potentially very traumatic for her. But from that context, one student went on to approach her and sexually assault her which is a serious criminal offence. We need to ask whether we think the group behaviour validated the individual s sense of entitlement and empowered him to sexually assault the woman student. Psychological research would suggest that it probably did. In this situation, it was a group of men who were using sexist and humiliating language. But we should note that women use this kind of language too, and are also responsible for perpetuating sexism. It isn t only sexist banter or jokes that give us cultural clues about relationships between women and men, or about appropriate sexual behaviour, in our culture. What else contributes to making up a social picture of what is acceptable or normal in our society? Or that encourages some people to think of women as inferior? E.g. McMahon & Banyard (2012) list: using sexist jokes & language, talking about women as sexual objects, displaying pornographic images of women, ranking women s physical appearances, joking about the use of sexual aggression, using degrading language to describe rape survivors or using rape jokes, displaying sexual images of women on social networking sites, & making harassing comments or gestures. Bonding as a group slide 11/16

12 It can be difficult for people to process the fact that an event (joke / compliment etc.) has more than one single social meaning i.e. just because something is funny, is technically a compliment or is a way of including someone in a conversation, does not stop it from being at the same time a way of putting someone in their place, or demeaning them. At some point someone may ask (looking at the green and red slides) whether having a group at all the act of group bonding is in fact the first step to an inevitable escalation of problematic behaviour. I.e. are we saying that in an ideal world we wouldn t want there to be a group of lads at all? If this question is asked please be unequivocal that there is no reason why belonging to any social group means that problematic behaviour will emerge as a norm. It is unfortunate that sexist behaviour has emerged as a norm In lad culture currently. 12/16

13 3 mins This pyramid demonstrates how attitudes and beliefs can be the starting point for discriminatory behaviour and ultimately violence for some people. If we challenge people when they express problematic views, we can help change the culture that fosters violence and abuse. There is a handout describing this in more detail. Familiarise yourself with the handout Pyramid slide & handout. 30 secs The attitudes and beliefs that are all around us in our culture about gender, sex differences and sex roles, are very strong. So are the expectations that are put on people to conform. Study after study has shown that in terms of our personalities as well as our intellectual abilities and the biology of our brains, there is much more variation among any group of men and among any group of women than there is between men and women. But traditional ideas about gender roles, as well as about sex and sexuality, are passed down in our culture and take effect from the minute we are born, resulting in pressure to identify with and behave as either a masculine or a feminine person. 30 secs Research shows that norms are policed quite heavily in our society, literally from birth. For example, a classic study in the 1970s showed that if people were given babies to play with, they would play differently with them, offering different toys and responding differently to how the babies played, depending on whether they were told they were with a boy or girl baby. Background reading for interested facilitators: Fine, C. (2010). Delusions of Gender: How our minds, society and neurosexism create difference. New York: WW Norton. Bem, S. L. (1993). The lenses of gender: Transforming the debate on sexual inequality. New Haven, CT: Yale University Press. E.g. Smith, C., & Lloyd, B. (1978). Maternal behavior and perceived sex of infant: Revisited. Child Development 49(4), Slide: Men s Health / Duchess of Cambridge Slide: Being a Man EVAW quote 13/16

14 1 min While it is widely acknowledged that ideal femininity is a problem for women in many ways, the pressures of masculinity give boys and men a different set of problems and issues to contend with, and here are a few of the ways in which men suffer disproportionately in our society. Taking on and internalising rigid ideas and gender role expectations can be harmful for men and for women alike. 2 mins Social norms Remember that sometimes we think that the people around us have concerns or preoccupations that they don t really have. Misperceptions about other people s belief systems are really common. Let s look at women for a moment. Studies of college students have found that women students overestimate the percentage of their female peers who prefer thinness and who engage in unhealthy eating and/or dieting. Looking at this slide, women in the green circle don t realise that most other women are in the green circle too, like them. Meanwhile women in the red circle believe that most people are as worried about being thin as they are. We are using this example because it is important to take the heat off men for a time, and demonstrate that misperception of social norms is a psychological act not limited to men alone. The information about thinness and disordered eating is complicated and this slide simplifies some points. College women were found to believe that other women: Are thinner Want to be thinner Exercise more frequently Are more aware of and influenced by the thinness norm Taken from the Report on Social Norms, 4(8) online at on_social_norms/rsnnov04.pdf Slide: Being a Man Masculinity Slide: social norm misperceptions among women 14/16

15 1 min Moving back into the realm of violence and abuse, let s look at men s misperceptions about other people s beliefs. Most men don t buy into myths about masculinity but they are likely to believe that others do. This is important because these beliefs can stop people from stepping up and speaking out. 1 min Let s say the red person has made a comment that is not ok maybe it s a sexist comment, maybe it s racist or homophobic. If nobody says anything, the red person is likely to believe that their behaviour is normal and that others endorse it. Other people in the group might be worrying that they are unusual for not sharing the red person s beliefs. But if someone speaks up (click to animate) We start to change the culture. Here are some examples of posters from campaigns in American colleges. This is a very important point. Most men, who are upset by the extreme examples of lad behaviour that we have shown, may think that they are alone. It is crucial to get across the very positive and empowering fact that they are likely to be in a majority. This is an animated slide clicking to move on will replace the red group with predominantly green people. Slide Research shows Slide the only one Click to animate Show 3 poster slides. 15/16

16 Next time In the next session we ll be looking more closely at some definitions and law around sexual offences. 16/16