REFRESH YOUR LIFE TODAY am pm MANAGING STRESS pm 1.00 pm THE SCIENCE OF BOUNCIBILITY pm HEALTH AND HAPPINESS
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1 TODAY REFRESH YOUR LIFE 9.30 am pm MANAGING STRESS pm 1.00 pm THE SCIENCE OF BOUNCIBILITY Shane Martin Reg.Psychol.Ps.,S.I pm HEALTH AND HAPPINESS Open-mindedness Space Time-out Respecting each other s privacy No need for personal sharing Support Hearing ourselves
2 Published by Orpen Press Web: Available in all good bookstores nationwide Moodwatchers is on Facebook Moodwatchers blog What do You See? What do You See?
3 What do You See? What do You See? (c) moodwatchers What matters most? HEALTH HAPPINESS MONEY? RESILIENCE Happiness counts.. Happier people live longer Happier children learn better Happier people encounter less disease Happier employees last longer in their jobs and are more loyal to their work
4 Three realities We are all vulnerable We will all face challenges, crises We underestimate our own potential to cope during the challenging times (c) moodwatchers What as psychology researched? Illness What is wrong with people Why people fall down (c) moodwatchers What does psychology provide? Interventions for people when they have symptoms Assessment and reports about what is wrong and what is causing it Theories for failure rather than success Science is as good as it gets Science can be applied to help us understand what makes us healthier and happier Authentic happiness Tests to see how weak you are, how low your mood is, how anxious or stressed you are?
5 What keeps us strong during the challenging times? MANAGING STRESS What is right about us? Harnessing inner-strengths - 8 to 0 but also 2+ to 8+ A degree of stress is helpful We all bark and bite!! Stressful events merit stress. Prolonged stress is bad for us Unhealthy stress eats away at our health and happiness The Role of Thinking within Stress At the heart of stress is stressful thinking How we make sense of things How we see ourselves in the world Conclusions we make about ourselves, others and the world
6 The Role of Thinking within Stress Bias thinking Irrational thinking Private thinking Powerful thinking The Power of Thinking Affects our physiology Prolonged stress impacts on our general physical health Prolonged stress is often an inroad to mental illness STRESS Impact on the Physical Appetite Cold hands/feet Constipation Diarrhoea Dry mouth Sweating Facial twitches or tics Need to loo Indigestion Tiredness Irregular breathing Headache
7 Impact on the Physical Chest pain Palpitations Rashes Stomach ache Sleep problems Weight loss/gain Frequent colds/flu Muscle tension Choking voice Tired eyes Nausea Impact on the Emotional Feeling tense/nervous Apprehensive/anxious Suspiciousness Gloominess Fussiness Low enthusiasm Cynicism Alienation Less confident De-motivated Feeling under attack Impact on the Behavioural Impact on the Behavioural Less social Claiming to be too busy to relax Eating fast Low productivity Managing time poorly Driving badly Smoking/drinking more Taking work home/ thinking of work at home Withdrawal from supportive relationships Being ratty Obsessed with punishing the enemy Less friendly to others Not smiling No humour
8 MOODWATCHERS MOODWATCHERS moodwatching We are thinkers We do a lot of thinking A lot of our thinking is automatic (learned) We do not stop and reflect on how we think moodwatching Our thinking affects our physiology We are not aware of the link between our thinking and our mood. How we think affects how we feel and in turn influences our behaviour. MOODWATCHERS moodwatching How we think influences our approach to life INTERNAL DIALOGUE AUTOMATIC SELF-TALK The sense we make of our own circumstances is crucial The meaning we attach to things MOODWATCHERS
9 LIFE EVENTS MOODWATCHERS LIFE EVENTS MOODWATCHERS HOW I FEEL HOW I FEEL HOW I THINK HOW I THINK INTERNAL DIALOGUE AUTOMATIC SELF-TALK Our private world of thoughts, our interpretation of past and present, our predictions for the future are very powerful influences on mood THE WAY WE THINK INFLUENCES OUR BEHAVIOUR
10 MOODWATCHERS THOUGHTS FEELINGS BEHAVIOUR Mary is waiting in the restaurant for her date to arrive. He s 30 minutes late. THOUGHT I hope he s okay. He is always speeding on the road. FEELING ANXIETY/WORRY ACTION Ring his mobile. I ll phone his mother. Mary is waiting in the restaurant for her date to arrive. He s 30 minutes late. THOUGHT My mother is right. He s a no-good! A total user! Mary is in the restaurant waiting on her date. He s 30 minutes late. THOUGHT He s a character. No sense of time. Won t even be aware that he s late. FEELING HURT/ANGER FEELING Relaxed, undisturbed ACTION Chill him out / Leave / Row ACTION Have another gin and tonic!!
11 MOODWATCHERS THE SENSE WE MAKE OF OUR WORLD IS CRUCIAL HOW WE SEE OURSELVES, OTHERS AND THE WORLD WHEN CHALLENGED Take note: THOUGHTS IN PLACE FEELINGS FELT ACTIONS PLANNED CORE BELIEFS STRESS BUILDING BELIEFS Perfectionism Control People Pleasing Competence
12 MOODWATCHERS MOODWATCHERS Exploring the thought: THE WAY WE THINK INFLUENCES OUR BEHAVIOUR Is it helpful? Is it fair? Is it absolutely true? MOODWATCHERS MOODWATCHERS It is not events per se which determine our feelings but the meaning that we attach to these events. When stressed our thinking becomes more rigid and distorted
13 MOODWATCHERS When emotionally upset incoming information is distorted with a negative bias in thinking No openmindness Is what I am thinking helping me? Is what I m thinking fair? Is what I m thinking true? Am I right to be as annoyed as I am? Does it really matter? How long do I want to be annoyed for? Have I got good advice or am I making conclusions on my own? Am I my own best or worst coach?
14 The Science of the Bouncibility What we all need A toolbox for coping in crisis How not to take a hit lessons in school Shane Martin Reg.Psychol.Ps.S.I. Web: The science of the survivor How to thrive despite adversity What is resilience? Resilience is the process of, capacity for, or outcome of successful adaption despite challenging or threatening circumstances (Master, Best & Garmezy, 1990) What is resilience? More than education, more than experience, more than training, a person s level of resilience will determine who succeeds and who fails. That s true in the cancer ward, it s true in the Olympics, and its true in the boardroom. Dean Becker, Harvard Business Review
15 GREAT NEWS It can be learned New research New interventions (particularly for children) Same interventions improve resilience in adults GREAT NEWS Doesn t mean that you have to become as hard as nails You are still entitled to the best possible life There is nothing disrespectful about trying to cope better We underestimate our potential to cope better through crisis and grow stronger Resilience A unique journey Ten Tips for greater resilience Unique for each person Certain factors are consistently shown to be important
16 1. EMOTIONAL AWARENESS The ability to identify your feelings and express your emotions, and when necessary, the ability to control your feelings (Reivich) Not being governed by your emotions Allowing for your emotional state Gender differences? Minding yourself There is a separation between who you are at your core and what you are going through 2. AVOID PANIC Highly resilient people are able to tolerate ambiguity so they don t rush to make decisions. They sit back and look at things in a thoughtful way before acting The need for rational thinking thinking straight Being objective, neutral and fair-minded Opening yourself up to advice Not being consumed by crisis The Role of Thinking within Stress At the heart of stress is stressful thinking How we make sense of things How we see ourselves in the world Conclusions we make about ourselves, others and the world The Role of Thinking within Stress Bias thinking Irrational thinking Private thinking Powerful thinking
17 INTERNAL DIALOGUE AUTOMATIC SELF-TALK Our private world of thoughts, our interpretation of past and present, our predictions for the future are very powerful influences on mood Is there another way of making sense of this? Am I right to be as annoyed as I am? Would this annoy you as much as it s annoying me? Does it really matter? Have I got good advice or am I making conclusions on my own? Am I my own best or worst coach? Consulting / Practical advice and solutions Watch out for KNOW-ALL-ISM The power of questions Doing your own thinking Not to be governed by panic 3. EMPATHY The ability to read and understand the emotions of others Understand how your situation affects others Seeing others, supporting others A compassionate heart is a compassionate heart at all times Enhancing our sense of family/ team Building relationships
18 Fostering kindness/compassion... The clinical benefits of kind acts Putting our worries into context Physiological rewards Seeing the world Cultivating a compassionate response You share imperfection with your fellow beings We're all stressed We all make mistakes Worse things have happened others You need to mind yourself not hammer yourself 4. SELF-CARE 5. UNLEARN HELPLESSNESS Running health protective strategies while in crisis Doing what is good for us whether we feel like it or not Boxing cleverly Failures are temporary setbacks! Never underestimate your own potential Doing different things, doing things differently Change (even forced change) can produce opportunities
19 6. OPTIMISM Having an optimistic explanatory style Realistic optimism Optimism which facilitates problem-solving wed to reality Engaging with the optimist Contemplating the optimistic view 7. SITUATION ANALYSIS This means the ability to think comprehensively about the problems /challenges you confront. Looking at problems from many perspectives, considering many factors and consulting with others Seeking the best possible advice Adhering to that advice 7. SITUATION ANALYSIS This means the ability to think comprehensively about the problems /challenges you confront. Looking at problems from many perspectives, considering many factors and consulting with others Seeking the best possible advice Adhering to that advice 8. TAPPING INTO YOUR STRENGTHS We all have inner-strengths Building our confidence around these strengths. Relying on your strengths to cope Playing to your strengths Tapping into the strengths of others - delegating, affirming
20 9. SOCIAL CONNECTIVITY People need people Remaining social/keeping friends The powerful resource of family The crucial role of the 'significant other' Keeping good company / leading on resilient people Taking all the help you can get Enlisting the team/family Sustaining the team/family Counselling Psychologists have shown that social ties and increased contact with family and friends are associated with a lower risk of illness What s more, a 2010 meta-analysis of 148 studies showed that social connection doesn t just help us survive health problems but the lack of it causes them (Williams, 2011) 10. PRAYER/FAITH Spirituality/religiousness Sense of purpose It s not all about me! Life as a journey Silence The benefits of prayer Investing in our spirituality: MINDFULNESS 11. LAUGHTER The gift of humour Humour therapy Hanging around with good humoured people
21 Laughing one hundred times amounts to the same exercise as riding a stationary bike for fifteen minutes. Five minutes of intense laughter can double the heart rate. Three minutes of laughter is equivalent to three minutes on a rowing machine. Laughter stimulates circulation, tones muscles, energises lungs and stimulates endorphins in the immune system. Dr William Fry (Stanford University) Not an exhaustive list Don t need to score high in them all to be given the stamp of resilience Major progress occurs by even considering which of the factors we are strong at and playing to these strengths as much as possible Every factor can be worked on Simple strategies YOUR PRECIOUS LIFE: How to live it well Shane Martin Reg.Psychol.Ps.S.I Cost free Scientifically validated Can be started instantly Health and happiness need work
22 1. RATIONAL THINKING! A degree of stress is helpful Prolonged stress is bad for us Unhealthy stress eats away at our health and happiness Consulting / Practical advice and solutions Thinking colours mood Rational thinking is key Knowing how we feel Watch out for KNOW-ALL-ISM The power of questions Not to be governed by panic Knowing how others feel
23 2. PRACTISE BEING COMPASSIONATE! Self-blame Over analysing Exclusive rights to stress You're not on your own! You share imperfection with your fellow beings We all make mistakes Worse things have happened others You need to mind yourself not hammer yourself The clinical benefits of kind acts Putting our worries into context Physiological rewards Seeing the world
24 3. UNLEARN HELPLESSNESS! Failures are temporary setbacks! Never underestimate your own potential Doing different things, doing things differently Change (even forced change) can produce opportunities 4. REACH OUT! Being social staying social The greatest friend of depression is solitude Getting away from it all Joining clubs and organisations Volunteering Starting new things courses etc. Quality time with you Quality time with family
25 The anterior cingulate cortex the same structure involved in the emotional component of physical pain light up when we are lonely or detached 5. INVEST IN GRATITUDE! Physiological effects of exclusion Grateful individuals report higher positive mood, optimism, life satisfaction, vitality, and less depression and envy than less grateful individuals (McCullough, Emmons, & Tsang, 2002). Counting our blessings Looking at what is right about our lives Celebrating all the things that we have rather than always talking about the things we don t have Digging deep Savouring golden moments or days Grateful people tend to be more helpful, supportive, forgiving, empathic, and agreeable (McCullough, Emmons, & Tsang, 2002) The practice of gratitude (counting blessings) is linked to fewer physical symptoms, more optimistic life appraisals, more time exercising, improved well-being and optimal functioning (Emmons & McCullough, 2003)
26 6. BASKING IN THE NOW Respecting the past but not being governed by it Not letting the past hold you back Over anxious about the future Today is a gift Make today count! 7. INCREASE FLOW! Doing the things we love best Doing the things we are best at Starting new things Switching the channel Being stretched
27 TWO NEW SYNDROMES SERIOUS BORING PERSON SYNDROME SERIOUS BUSY PERSON SYNDROME 8. INVEST IN THE SPIRITUAL SELF! Sense of purpose It s not all about me! Life as a journey The benefits of prayer Investing in our spirituality: MINDFULNESS 9. Mind your body EXERCISE, DIET, SLEEP
28 10. Invest in HUMOUR! Laughing one hundred times amounts to the same exercise as riding a stationary bike for fifteen minutes. Five minutes of intense laughter can double the heart rate. Three minutes of laughter is equivalent to three minutes on a rowing machine. Laughter stimulates circulation, tones muscles, energises lungs and stimulates endorphins in the immune system. Dr William Fry (Stanford University) Web: moodwatchers@eircom.net Moodwatchers is on Facebook Moodwatchers blog
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