CULTURAL REVOLUTIONS CHALLENGING - RACISM SEXISM HOMOPHOBIA AGEISM

Transcription

1 OLDER, WISER, SEXUALLY SMARTER: Sexuality Education for Mid and Later Life Peggy Brick Consortium on Sexuality and Aging

2 CULTURAL REVOLUTIONS CHALLENGING - RACISM SEXISM HOMOPHOBIA AGEISM

3 This SEXUAL REVOLUTION- Is part of the LONGEVITY REVOLUTION Means older adults are claiming their RIGHT to be SEXUAL. Needs good SEXUALITY EDUCATION

4 LISTEN to the QUESTIONS! 1. How do we find beauty in our aging bodies? 2. How do you overcome strict religious do s anddon ts? don 3. How do you handle sex & disabilities such as heart disease? 4. Do older people have more affairs due to sex ratio & dysfunctional partners?

5 100 s of Anonymous Questions!! 5. How can I get a penis to fit when there are two good sized bellies? 6. What about monogamy? Is it necessary for a satisfactory relationship? 7.How do you find men for sex & relationships? 8. What about the men in this class whose wives don t know they re taking it?

6 QUESTIONS = NEED 9. Can a man have an orgasm without an erection? 10. Medications are so common how can we deal with problems of libido & desire? 11. What about lack of stimulation when a woman looses her breasts due to cancer? 12. How to get a partner to try new ideas?

7 HOW WOULD YOU RESPOND? 13. Why are women afraid to give blow jobs? 14. What are the factors in people s willingness to acknowledge their true identity as lesbian or gay? 15. As age overtakes my wife, her interest in sex is 0. Is it appropriate to seek an alternative sexual outlet?

8 START with HUMOR! JOKES & CARTOONS 1. Introduce a topic. 2. Reduce anxiety & prepare for learning. 3. Encourage participation. 4. Examine stereotypes of sex & aging. 5. Make us laugh at ourselves!

9 WHERE to LEARN about Sex & Aging Community centers College & university adult programs Churches, temples, other religious sites House parties usually selling toys, etc. INTERNET beware the snake oil! Retirement communities Professional development workshops!

10 Model for Teaching Past Present Future Learned Learn about Set Sexual sex & aging Appropriate Scripts Re-evaluate evaluate Goals Attitudes, old scripts Beliefs, Values

11 Problem Scripts Sex is for the young Old bodies are ugly and not sexual Sex is a natural act It s not OK to talk about sex Masturbation is wrong Male should be initiator Sex equals intercourse

12 Older, Wiser, Sexually Smarter: A Comprehensive Approach Sexuality: it s our history! Reflections: Past, Present, Future Sociogram: Your personal network Getting a second wind: sexuality at midlife Body Image: Love the skin you re in

13 OLDER? Gotta Be Wiser! Sexuality: disability & chronic illness Sexual aids & toys: a 25,000 year history Safer sex: what everyone needs to know Talk about sex: with physician, i partner, children & grandchildren Decisions: what s moral & ethical? Intimacy: a theory of love

14 OLDER? Gotta be smarter! Single: Looking for love in later life Everyone grows older: issues for people p who are gay, lesbian & bisexual Spirituality: the impact of beliefs The Internet: safer cyber sex Sexual rights: freedom, autonomy, privacy, pleasure, information do older adults have them?

15 CARTOON WATCHING - What stereotypes are revealed? - Are men or women the butt of the joke? - What topics might the cartoon open for discussion?

16 Join the movement! Educate Yourself books, videos, websites, workshops. Have books, films, bibliographies available for loan. Keep lubricant, condoms, toys in sight. Learn strategies t for opening discussion. i Think about giving workshops/classes. Collect jokes and cartoons!

17 INTIMACY, SEXUALITY & AGING KEY FACTS 1. Life expectancy increased by 30 years in the 20 th century. 2. Almost 60% of women and 30% of men over 65 are unmarried. 3. People with a positive attitude towards aging live 7.5 years longer than those with negative attitudes.

18 4. Relationship factors and mental health are more important predictors of sexual well-being than physiological factors of sexual arousal and response. 5. About half of both men and women over 40 report feeling guilty after masturbating.

19 Intimacy, Sexuality & Aging 6. The expectation that older men and women will not be sexual is probably responsible for more sexual problems than physical changes. 7. If an older couple ceases sexual activity, it it is usually the choice of the female. 8. Patients with chronic illness often need to change their sexual positions and activities in order to be satisfied.

20 Intimacy, Sexuality and Aging 9. A common sexual problem for women vaginal dryness can often be remedied by over-the- counter lubricants. 10. These common myths are FALSE : -sex saps strength - too much sex is unhealthy h - having sex decreases the effectiveness of medications.

21 Intimacy, Sexuality & Aging g 11. Aging lesbian and gay individuals have care giving needs that are often different from their heterosexual counterparts. 12. In nursing and retirement homes, older lesbian and gay couples often face greater discrimination from staff than their heterosexual counterparts.

22 Intimacy, Sexuality & Aging The majority of people with chronic illness and disability can benefit by getting information about the sexual effects of their illness or disability. 14. Since older people tend to visit physicians more frequently, a sexually transmitted infection is more likely l to be discovered. d

23 Intimacy, Sexuality & Aging g 15. The most important predictor of sexual interest and activity in later years is the importance and frequency of activity it in earlier life. 16. As people age and are less focused on their genitals, they are more likely to discover the sensuousness of their entire bodies.

24 KEY FACTS: Source Older, Wiser, Sexually Smarter: 30 Lessons for Adults Only.. Brick, P; Lunquist, J; Sandak, A;Taverner, B. Morristown, NJ: Planned Parenthood of Greater Northern, NJ. (2009) x 120