The Workplace Bully 8/29/2014. Welcome to the fourteenth in a series of webinars for peer supporters.

Transcription

1 Welcome to the fourteenth in a series of webinars for peer supporters. This webinar series is presented by members of the International Association of Peer Supporters (inaps) with generous assistance from Optum, without whom this series would not be possible. inaps is solely responsible for the content of the webinars. The webinar will begin at noon, Eastern. Thank you for your participation! Audio When signing into the webinar website, please be certain you enter a telephone number (without an extension) for call back. The audio portion of the webinar will be on your telephone. 2 by E. Susan Meekhof 1

2 Peter Ashenden Director of Consumer Affairs OptumHealth Behavioral Solutions Contact Information T F Peter.ashenden@optum.com by E. Susan Meekhof 2

3 These webinars may be recorded and made available on our website for future viewing. By joining the webinar you agree that your name, if you choose to provide it, and any interactions you have in the chat or during the Q&A session of the webinar may be included in the recording Thank you for your participation! The Workplace Bully Who and You and What to Do By E. Susan Meekhof by E. Susan Meekhof 3

4 Workplace Bullying and the Recovery to Practice Curriculum Objectives Understand who is the workplace bully Understand why adults bully Understand and equip oneself to handle adult bullying by learning various practical techniques Understand the value of you versus the value of your workplace by E. Susan Meekhof 4

5 Defining Adult Bully An adult who tries to take advantage of another adult being perceived as more vulnerable. The Adult Bully Methods Laughing at errors Bad report Abrupt avoidance Looks & Snarls Gossip and rumors Non-friendly games Triangles Cyber bullying by E. Susan Meekhof 5

6 The Adult Bully s Goal To gain control through aggression, hostility, or intimidation by method ofbeing mean with intent. The Adult Bully s Desired End Result Increase ongoing, painful and humiliating feelings Wearing the victim to a lower state of selfconfidence by the bully to defuse his own incompleteness Feel order to the bully s workplace by controlling the environment. by E. Susan Meekhof 6

7 Why Do They Do? They want your job or some part of it They re jealous They want to see you fail & feel They bully everyone, it s not about you To prove themselves, bullies often feel inferior Because you re emotional and it gives the bully satisfaction Adult Bully Types Those that have little regard for workplace consequences, they feel they have the right to treat the victim poorly. They appear to have high selfesteem but are actually over absorbed in narcissism. The depressed or low self-esteem adult permeates the workplace with negative attitudes, passive aggressive behaviors, whining persuasive statements, triangles and tattling. by E. Susan Meekhof 7

8 Workplace Bully Type The adult bully who lacks understanding of the effect of his spontaneous and random impulsive behavior. Can be a workplace clown. His or her coworkers may bully back in harmless retaliation. Oops, the adult mistakenly wronged the other adult by being offensive. This person explains and apologizes. The workplace quickly returns to a safe environment. The Attack and the PLAN Back Predictability I may not like what you said but I do not fear you Personal assessment Do I need change in any area of my life that the bully identifies as weak or incomplete and therefore build up my self-esteem What have I got to lose? And the longer we maintain relationships with people who treat you unacceptably, the more it erodes your self-confidence What have I got to win? Confrontation with reaching a goal together by E. Susan Meekhof 8

9 Transitional words of redirection Speak about & reward behavior I really like the way you What Does Self Care Look Like? Courage to self care. Your life vs. the job Plenty of Fish Concept Leaving the situation or job If they can t change I can No lack of alternatives How much do I like my job? Could I be happy recreating somewhere else? by E. Susan Meekhof 9

10 Questions and Discussion A short quiz on this webinar is now available on the International Association of Peer Supporters website: If you complete the quiz, a certificate will be mailed to you (U.S. Postal Mail) within 3-4 weeks. by E. Susan Meekhof 10

11 Our thanks to Peter Ashenden and Optum for their ongoing support of this webinar series and their dedication to quality in the practice of peer support. by E. Susan Meekhof 11