Finding Hope in the midst of fear and anxiety

Transcription

1 Blake Jennings Grace Bible Church - Suthwd Finding Hpe in the midst f fear and anxiety Fear and anxiety are unavidable in this precarius wrld. While sme f us struggle with these nly peridically, many thers suffer daily with full-blwn panic attacks and anxiety disrders. S hw d yu find hpe and healing when fear and anxiety invade yur life? We re in week 3 f a 4-week series n finding hpe in the struggles f life Week 1: lneliness and lss Week 2 (tday): discuragement and depressin Week 3: fear and anxiety Week 4: defeat and addictin This week: hw t find hpe in the midst f fear and anxiety - Sme f yu struggle with anxiety s yu re lcked in - Sme f yu dn t s yu may be tempted t tune this message ut - I dn t want that s let me give yu a few things t wrry abut Scientists reset the Dmsday clck - Symbl representing likelihd f man-made glbal catastrphe esp. glbal nuclear war - Maintained since 1947 by the members f the Bulletin f Atmic Scientists - Clser t midnight, the clser t dmsday clsest ever is 2 minutes till - Set nce in 1953 after US & Sviet Unin started testing hydrgen bmbs and last week! Smetime between Feb and April a Chinese Space Statin will reenter earth s atmsphere - They lst cntact in have n cntrl ver it - 34 feet lng, 11 feet in diameter, weighs punds and n ne knws where it will hit! Yur bed a typical used mattress cntains between 100,000 t 10 millin dust mites - Wrse: 10% f weight f a 2-year-ld pillw chalked up t dust mite carcasses & feces Cellphne: scientists at the University f Arizna - cell phnes carry 10X mre bacteria than mst tilet seats - 16% f all cellphnes have human fecal matter n them! We live in anxius times! S much t wrry abut and fear S this week we ll talk abut hw t respnd well t fear and anxiety - With her permissin I ll share Julie s stry: battling an anxiety disrder fr the last 4 years - Yes, we are a fine pair! Jke abut whether my depressin caused her anxiety r vice versa - While it s tugh t bth struggle with mental disrders, it s als a blessing given us a level f cmpassin fr ne anther that is priceless Gd knew I needed t be humbled by my wn struggle t be able t fully empathize with Julie s - Because anxiety s never really been my struggle I had typical wrry befre big test r when a big bill came but never fr lng, never panic - S it was easy in my yunger days t lk dwn n peple wh wrried a lt

2 - Just think abut what Jesus says in Mt 6:25, Fr this reasn I say t yu, d nt be wrried - It s simple: Dn t wrry just trust Gd, and stp being anxius! - I apprached ther peple s anxiety similar t Bb Newhart in this sketch frm years ag Hpefully we re a lt mre gracius than Bb! But ur advice is pretty much same if we tell peple: just stp wrrying and have mre faith What I ve learned: there are times when anxiety is nt a chice and stp it is bad advice We will all struggle at times with anxiety and fear that s nrmal and it can actually be gd! - Yu re walking alne thrugh a dark parking lt at night yu shuld feel sme fear! - Heightens senses, tenses muscles, prepares yu t fight r run GOOD prtects yu Hwever: mst f us will experience times in life when anxiety will exceed what is helpful - Anxiety is bad in excess... when it is prlnged r nt related t a specific step - Can begin t negatively affect yur life and becme harmful - Incredibly cmmn: > 53% f cllege students described feeling mre than average r tremendus stress within the past 12 mnths - Tremendus stress isn t gd stress rbs yu f sleep can t think clearly can t functin If left untreated: it may becme a full-blwn anxiety disrder - Define: Anxiety disrders - The Anxiety and Phbia Wrkbk published in 2010 anxiety disrders #1 mental health prblem amng American wmen 2 nd nly t alchl and drug abuse amng men ~ 17% f US (~50M) suffered panic attacks, phbias, r anxiety disrders in past year ~ ¼ f adult ppulatin will suffer an anxiety disrder at sme time during their life - Thse numbers are high and are grwing anxiety disrders becming mre prevalent - Wrkbk cntinues, Peple living in Western sciety are currently experiencing mre stress than they have at any previus time in histry, and it is this stress that explains the increased incidence f anxiety disrders. - Trubling trend especially in cnservative circles: refer t yunger generatins as snwflakes weak and verly sensitive That is bth unchristian and WRONG! Verifiable truth that the pace f change in this wrld is accelerating, largely due t the stunning rate f technlgical prgress in the last 30 years. The grund beneath ur cllective feet is mving faster than it ever has befre. S peple dn t have the time t prcess and adjust t change. As a result, yung peple tday are grwing up withut the scial and cultural stability that mst f us tk fr granted when we were their age. New threats are assailing them at an unprecedented rate. That can t but lead t higher rates f anxiety and depressin. The yunger generatins aren t weak their wrld is simply harder than the wrld we inherited when we were their age. Anxiety and anxiety disrders are cmmn and will becme mre cmmn in the years t cme S hw d yu find hpe in the midst f that grwing anxiety? - Nt by telling peple t just stp it! It s far mre cmplex than that. - Just as with depressin, there are multiple, interrelated steps designed t treat the whle persn. - I ll give yu a few this mrning, but let me be clear this is NOT AN EXHAUSTIVE LIST! Anxiety is t big a subject t cver in ne sermn. These are just a few steps that have prven particularly helpful fr Julie and thers struggling with anxiety.

3 - And hpefully yu ve guessed the first step same as the last tw weeks! 1. Talk abut it - We ve seen many biblical examples f men and wmen wh were nt afraid t admit t Gd and t thers that they were struggling with lneliness, depressin, r anxiety. David, Slmn, Elijah, Jeremiah, even Jesus, Himself they did nt hide their emtinal struggles. Emtins are nt a sign f weakness, nr are emtinal struggles. Hiding emtins ut f sme sense f embarrassment r pride that s weakness! Yu keep yur struggles in the dark and they ll cnsume yu. Yu must bring them int the light. - S if yu struggle with fear, wrry, r anxiety, talk penly and ften abut it - with Gd 1 Peter 5:6-7 Therefre humble yurselves under the mighty hand f Gd, that He may exalt yu at the prper time, casting all yur anxiety n Him, because He cares fr yu. - with thers - with experts Pride is bund up in the heart f a fl and keeps him frm talking penly t Gd abut his needs. But the wise man r wman is humble, and because f that humility, he r she is willing t hnestly pur ut all fears, wrries, and failures t Gd. That s what Gd wants yu t d! He can handle it! He is pleased when yu humbly cry ut t Him. Remember, Gd made us t be cmmunal beings, nt islated individuals. Yu were nt designed t d life alne. Yu will fall if yu try. Instead, yu were designed t lean n thers as thers were designed t lean n yu. Severe anxiety, like depressin, is a disease that requires expert treatment. Yu need an expert in yur life a cunselr, a psychlgist, a dctr smene wh can help yu evaluate and treat yur anxiety. It was an expert wh saved my wife in the midst f her battle with anxiety. - When things were at their abslute wrst 4 years ag, Julie fund that the nrmal things we d t try t cure anxiety things like reading scripture, praying, resting, exercising nne f it was wrking as it had in the past. Anxiety began t cnsume her t the pint that she culdn t sleep r eat r, fr a time, even get ff the cuch. - And it was then that she finally realized, I need t talk t a cunselr. S she met with a Christian cunselr here in twn expecting t get a new relaxatin technique r methd t help her calm dwn, but 5 minutes in t telling the cunselr her stry, the cunselr stpped her and said, Yu are slipping int a pit yu can t climb ut f. Yu need medicatin. - Julie culdn t make that assessment herself, nr culd I. Pastrs aren t trained in diagnsing r treating an anxiety disrder. But cunselrs are. And meeting with that expert cunselr saved Julie s life, just as cunseling saved mine. - Dn t hesitate t talk with a cunselr, psychlgist, r dctr if yur anxiety isn t getting better. That s nt a sign f weakness it s wisdm and strength t get help when yu need it. One f the mst imprtant things a cunselr can d is help yu identify the cause f yur anxiety. Often it will be multiple, interrelated causes. Here are sme examples again, nt an exhaustive list.

4 2. Identify the Causes if pssible - Genetics Bth anxiety and depressin can run in families. There s a genetic cmpnent t it. If yur parents r grandparents r relatives have struggled with it, the chances are higher than average that yu will struggle with it. That s n ne s fault. That s just the reality f living in fallen bdies in a fallen wrld ur genetic cde is brken. As a result, all f us inherit increased risk twards certain diseases and struggles. Fr sme peple that will be anxiety. - Past Trauma Childhd greatly increases the risk f anxiety disrders, depressin, addictin, eating disrders, and suicide Adult sldiers at war, anyne wh experiences vilence, peple living in pverty, smene facing a health crisis Trauma smetimes leads t a cnditin mst f us have heard f: PTSD pst-traumatic stress disrder Tend t think f it as a prblem nly sldiers deal with. That s nt true. Anyne wh experiences a traumatic situatin can suffer frm PTSD. Let me pause here and say: if yu experienced significant physical, sexual, r emtinal trauma as a child r as an adult, Gd lves yu and can heal yu but yu really need t talk with a cunselr r psychlgist. Dn t ignre it. Prcessing that trauma with an expert can help yu get t a place where it has less pwer ver yu. - Present Danger As we said earlier, sme amunt f anxiety r fear is apprpriate when yu face an immediate threat like walking thrugh a dark parking lt. The prblem is when danger desn t g away and, therefre, the fear persists. Then it can easily turn int an anxiety disrder. Cmmn amng thse living in pverty. They have a legitimate reasn t be afraid! They dn t have the fd, shelter, security they need t prvide fr themselves and their family. Of curse they feel anxius! But unlike the persn walking thrugh a dark parking lt, pverty desn t end in 5 minutes! It s prlnged, and s fear turns int an anxiety disrder. - Fear f the Future This is yur classic case f wrry. Afraid smething bad might happen in the future: yu ll lse yur jb sme day; get cancer; yur kids will rebel & run away This is nt beneficial anxiety because yu are nt facing a clear and present danger. Yur bdy desn t need t g int fight r flight mde! Yu dn t need an adrenaline bst. This kind f anxiety ver a future pssibility is just ging t hurt yu. - Prlnged stress One f the mst cmmn causes Dr. Burne, authr f The Anxiety and Phbia Wrkbk, anxiety disrders are an utcme f cumulative stress acting ver time. If yu live in a cnstant state f stress, yu greatly increase the chances yu will eventually suffer frm panic attacks and anxiety disrders. I have a friend wh s a lawyer wh rushed t the hspital because he thught he was having a heart attack. It turned ut t be a panic attack caused by his insane caselad! He lived in a cnstant state f stress trying desperately t meet a tn f curt-appinted deadlines fr which there was n grace at all if he missed ne! Stress leads t anxiety. - A medical issue Anxiety disrders can riginate frm unrelated medical issues

5 e.g. years ag we had a cllege student wh fell int anxiety, panic, and eventually a cmplete mental breakdwn all due t a very bad reactin t a new medicatin she was n. Our bdies are cmplex, and a medical issue in ne part f yur bdy can trigger smething cmpletely unexpected like anxiety and panic. Julie and I can see a cmbinatin f these causes behind her anxiety - There s a genetic cmpnent She is genetically predispsed twards anxiety based n the fact that many f her relatives have struggled with anxiety disrders t But there were ther causes as well that pushed her int a full-blwn anxiety disrder - Prlnged stress Battled with infertility fr 3 years Almst died in childbirth Gracie had clic fr the first 4 mnths she just cried fr hurs and hurs with n cause and n cure and there was anther baby t take care f S stressful in ur hme that my brain has blcked it all ut. I remember almst nthing frm the first 6 mnths f my kids lives and dn t want t! S stressful that fr years after, she wuld hear phantm crying in the middle f the night, like when the AC kicked n, and she d wake up in a panic t run t the kids She still has t sleep with earplugs s she can t hear anything at night because it will trigger a panic respnse She experienced practically traumatic levels f stress fr years - 4 years ag Medical issues Had a series f unfrtunate events that led t her anxiety disrder Had a rt canal, but it didn t wrk. One f the rts was missed, went necrtic and caused intense pain. Result, she had t have 8 mre rt canals n that ne tth! All f that trauma in her head led t a resurgence f migraines. Then she started getting really bad chest pain it seemed like it was whenever she ate, and it was wrse at night. Gt mre and mre intense. We visited a hst f dctrs but nthing fixed it. It gt s bad, that she became terrified t eat and started lsing a lt f weight s much, in fact, that she had t wear multiple layers f clths t church because she was afraid peple wuld assume she was anrexic. We fund ut a few mnths later that the chest pain was actually cnstant, recurring panic attacks. It wasn t fd. It was panic. But we didn t knw that at the time. And as a result, there was ne mre cause t Julie s anxiety - Fear f the future She began t fear that she wuld never get better. That she d always be in pain. That she d never sleep r eat well again. She was afraid she wasn t ging t make it. - Yu add all 4 f thse causes tgether and anyne wuld fall apart! It wasn t her fault just like it s nt yur fault if yu ve struggled with an anxiety disrder. The causes are ften beynd yur cntrl. Once yu knw the causes, hw d yu treat yur anxiety? 3. Fight Negative Self-Talk - Self-talk what we say r think t urselves in the curse f ur day Our self-talk can fuel r quench anxiety - Negative self-talk fuels anxiety Telling yurself, It s never ging t get better. It s hpeless. I m s wrthless. This is all my fault. Gd desn t care abut me. Gd isn t listening t me. These negative statements have pwer they mve yur mental state in a negative directin and increase the pwer f anxiety ver yu.

6 Same with dwelling n wrst case scenaris. Yu feel discmfrt in yur stmach, g nt WebMD, lk up all pssible causes, #8 n the list stmach cancer! Yu lk up stmach cancer, see hrrible pictures, start thinking thrugh what will life be like when yu re n chem fr stmach cancer because that s prbably ging t happen! That s negative self-talk yu are talking t yurself abut wrst case scenaris. That negativity shapes yu. Ralph Wald Emersn Beware f what yu dwell n fr that yu shall surely becme. If yu speak negative things t yurself, yu will becme mre negative and thus mre wrried, anxius, fearful, and hpeless. - Frtunately, yu can fight negative self-talk. Yu can fill yur mind with psitive things that will shape yu in a psitive directin and reduce the pwer f anxiety in yur life. - What psitive things? - Read Philippians 4:6-8 - A cuple specific things Paul has in mind. - 1) Truth Fill yur mind with that which is true, hnrable, right Dwell n truths abut Gd, abut wh He s made yu t be, abut the prmises He s made yu. Fill yur mind with scripture As I mentined a cuple weeks ag: I lve Ps 23 Fr Julie: it s Isaiah 40:28-31 D yu nt knw? Have yu nt heard? The Everlasting Gd, the Lrd, the Creatr f the ends f the earth des nt becme weary r tired. His understanding is inscrutable. He gives strength t the weary, and t him wh lacks might He increases pwer Thugh yuths grw weary and tired, and vigrus yung men stumble badly, yet thse wh wait fr the Lrd will gain new strength; they will munt up with wings like eagles, they will run and nt get tired, they will walk and nt becme weary. Find yur passages f scripture that remind yu f psitive things abut Gd, abut yu, abut the future, abut His prmises. Meditate n them. Memrize them. And then when yu sense negative self-talk starting take yur mind captive by repeating that passage t yurself. - 2) Gratitude Phil 4:6 key phrase, WITH GRATITUDE d nt merely lk ut fr yur wn persnal interests, but als fr the interests f thers. If yu want t have peace replace anxiety, then yu must practice gratitude when yu pray. Gratitude gives birth t peace! When we reflect n all the gd things Gd has dne fr us in the past, it reminds us that Gd is GOOD and gives us cnfidence that He will cntinue t d gd things fr us in the future, and that cnfidence gives us peace. But gratitude isn t natural t us. When we start t feel wrried, ur brains dn t autmatically shift t thughts f gratitude twards Gd. It takes wrk. Yu ve gt t chse t say thanks even when yu dn t feel like it. Yu have t build that habit. Gratitude is a spiritual DISCIPLINE yu have t wrk at it. S when yu sense negative self-talk cming, stp and give thanks. And t help yu give thanks, use an Ebenezer Line in Cme thu Funt here I raise my Ebenezer what?! = a memrial f stacked stnes the Israelites built in the Old Testament t cmmemrate what Gd had dne fr them (pic) Desn t have t be rcks it s anything tangible that reminds yu f Gd s gdness. E.g. a picture, a verse n the wall, a gratitude jurnal, etc

7 4. Take Care f Yurself - What is the ultimate act f lve fr a Christian? T give his r her life fr thers: be a martyr Just ne prblem with being a martyr: yu die and that s nt an ptin fr mst f us! We have t stay alive t take care f yur kids, yur family, friends, d yur jb, get yur degree - That means yu MUST take care f yurself. That s a mral imperative. - Julie and I call this the Put yur wn mask n first principle In an airplane put yur wn mask n and then put yur child s mask n - Read Phil 2:4 assumes yu are lking after yur wn interests as well! - Practically speaking: - 1) Live within yur limits Yu need t knw yur wn physical, emtinal, and relatinal limits the limits Gd gave yu when He made yu And yu need t respect thse limits and live within them They ll be different fr every ne f us s we can t cmpare urselves t thers. Yu dn t need t live up t smene else s limits yu need t live up t yur wn limits. E.g. Lts f pastrs g ut t lunch with peple after church n Sunday. I dn t. And I wn t. Because I knw my limits. When I m dne preaching I need t crawl int a hle. And any emtinal energy I have left belngs t my family. I ve learned my limits, and nw I give myself the gift f n I m nt ging t try t please everyne r live up t smene else s example. I m ging t respect the limits Gd designed int my life and say n t thse things that wuld take me beynd thse limits. Because I have t take care f myself s I can be the best husband, father, and pastr I can be. - 2) Take care f yur bdy Just as we talked abut last week with depressin anxiety affects bth yur spirit and yur bdy. S t fight it yu must take care f yur bdy. Get gd sleep, watch what yu eat, get cnsistent exercise yu must treat yur bdy well. Julie is nw in the best shape f her life because she s learned t priritize exercise. It s nt just abut hw she lks; far mre imprtant it s abut hw she feels. Exercise gives her strength t battle anxiety. If yu re struggling with anxiety regularly and haven t talked abut it with a dctr, yu shuld. Get a physical. See if there s smething ff in yur bdy that culd be cntributing t this anxiety. - 3) Pursue things that refresh yu Fr me, it s fast cars Fr Julie: Grwing rses smething satisfying abut seeing flwers grw Adpting a dg I was never ging t have a dg I actually tld my kids, We will never wn a dg. 2 mnths later, we had a dg. I was wrng abut a dg. Julie brught this sweet pup in t ur hme and she s been s therapeutic fr us. Just smething abut petting a dg n yur lap that melts anxiety. 5. Cnsider Medicatin - All f the previus steps may nt be enugh. It wasn't fr Julie. She needed mre. She needed medicatin t vercme anxiety, just like I did t vercme depressin. - S she went t her dctr and he tld her - Yur bdy is in panic-mde. It thinks smene has strapped yu t railrad tracks in frnt f an ncming train! Yu need medicine just like a heart patient needs bld pressure meds. Diet and exercise aren t enugh t help them it s nt enugh fr yu either.

8 - S Julie went n medicine, and it saved her life! It made an incredible difference by rebalancing the chemicals in her bdy. It dialed back that crtisl and adrenaline bst she was living in and allwed her t rest. - During this time f treatment, my wife has had peple wh are trying t be helpful tell her that she needs t get ff medicatin because f smething they read nline r because they have a predispsitin against psychtrpic medicatins. That is nt helpful. It just adds fear and shame n tp f the struggle. Yu need t d what yur dctr tells yu t d, and if it includes medicatin, yu shuldn t feel fear r shame. Yu are nt immature r unspiritual because yu need anxiety meds! Yu re just like all f us wh need medicine frm time t time t be healthy. Yu may need it fr a little while, r a very lng time, and that s yu and yur dctr s call. Finally, let me share sme really gd news! As Julie has applied these 5 steps her anxiety has gtten remarkably better. It s nt gne, just like my depressin isn t gne. They will prbably be with us until we see Jesus they re nt things that just g away. But these steps have brught immense healing t bth f us and helped us be the spuses and parents Gd has called us t be. There s hpe fr us and there s hpe fr yu n matter hw lng r hw intensely yu have battled anxiety. Gd can make it better if yu ll fllw these steps.